View Full Version : Hope this one doesn't get me in trouble buuuuuut:

11th Feb 2006, 05:16
But what's the allowed age difference in a relationship? I'm currently 17, and I've always gone with 2 years either direction, but my friend (who's also 17) recently hooked up with a 13 year old, so what do you guys think: wrong or not? For that matter, what do you think about older age groups (you know, like 20-25, 25-30, etc.)?

11th Feb 2006, 06:09
A thirteen and a seventeen year old, that's illegal in some parts.
Personally, I think you're too old to date 15 year olds.
The age difference between your self and spouse increases with age.
Date people within 20 months of your age when your twenty, And I see nothing wrong with a fifty year old dating someone who's sixty five, interpolate the rest.

11th Feb 2006, 13:53
It's a tough subject, really.

I agree that the age difference between partners increases as you grow older, so a 31 year old could go out with a 24 year old (as two of my friends proved, woman and man respectively).

A 17 and 13 year old is just a tad strange though. I think 13 is too young for a physical relationship though.

Thirteen is very young.

11th Feb 2006, 14:23
well typically I'd say it's wrong wrong wrong.

a 13 year old is (generally) leaps and bounds behind a 17 year old from a growth pov.

I don't think age gaps are a problem at all later on. whether your 40 and dating a 20 year old if you're both happy together then what else matters?

But the age gap you mentioned isn't right at all imo. His GF won't be 'mature' enough for him.

Age gaps themselves are not a problem. But a pre/mid-puberty child with an adult is just wrong for obvious reasons

11th Feb 2006, 15:21
When my daughter's 13, she won't be dating anyone. Maybe when she's 16 or so. Teenage years are a bit touchy, especially around the magic 18 in a physical relationship. One's over, one's under - that could get illegal. When someone is that young, keep it to within a couple of years because it's never going to be permanent.

Being an adult doesn't always help either. I'm 9 years older than the wife and our differences in maturity sometimes still create problems. :rolleyes:

12th Feb 2006, 02:42
17 and 13 hmm...I think it's wrong, 13 is too young and exspecialy if it's with a 17 year old.

as for your friend I would say afew people might brand him a pedofile

12th Feb 2006, 04:44
You guys seem to have about the same views as me on this one. Now all I've got to do is get MOD EDIT: **name removed to protect the identity of off-forum party** to look at this thread

Umah Bloodomen
12th Feb 2006, 06:02
My personal preference is four years either way. It's very common for the majority of the teenage population to be lacking in the maturity department. At the same token, I've known many-a-"man" (older men mind you) whose maturity is very comparable to that of a four-year old, so the "maturity" argument can also go either way. ;)

I personally do not believe the majority of thirteen year olds are mentally/emotionally capable of making a relationship decison based on anything but impulse and that ever-present desire to be cool and fit in (enter the "arm candy" and "ooo yay! I'm popular" theories :p ). Many laws, of course, agree, hence why there is statutory rape legislation implemented.

And of course, as sad as it may be, there are also psychological issues at play here (with the older of the two parties). What exactly is the attraction to a thirteen year old, and is that attraction appropriate behavior? Puppy love is one thing, [insert appropriate adjective here] deviance is another entirely.

Food for thought, I'm sure.

12th Feb 2006, 20:42
you bring up some good points umah, and while I cannot comment on my friend's girlfriend's mental constitution, I can tell you that she's, erm... well she's certainly physically developed, and you may call me crazy if you wish but I have a stong feeling that this played a large role in MOD EDIT: **name removed to protect the identity of off-forum party** decision. So I leave the final judgement up to the readers of this thread.

Umah Bloodomen
13th Feb 2006, 08:57
Ah yes, yet another superficial relationship. Unfortunately, the chances of this "relationship" lasting very long is slim, IMO. In the words of Qui-Gon Jinn: "There's always a bigger fish." (Pun of course, intended) **chuckles** ;)

On a semi-related note; upon reviewing this thread, I just noticed you actually mentioned the minor-party by name. It's not a good idea to be doing that here as it potentially subjects to negative repercussions. With that said, the name has been removed. I hope you understand. :)

13th Feb 2006, 12:16
For the most part I'd probably agree a 13 year old girl will be more mature than a 17 year old boy...

The girl can boast she has someone 17 to her friends.

the boy will be a laughing stock because he can't pull someone his own age.

(that's how it worked when I was in school anyway...)

And let's not even get into what the girl's parent's would say!

13th Feb 2006, 12:49
13 year olds shouldnt really be dating anyway, but they certainly shouldnt be dating someone who might reasonably expect to be having sex if they were dating someone of their own age.

when one of the parties is 13 a four year age gap would certainly qualify as "ikky", but as they both get older it will be less important - 21 and 17 would be less worthy of comment and 34 and 37 would be considered quite normal. The issue comes from someone who is still a "child" dating someone who isnt.

13th Feb 2006, 20:57
@Umah BloodOmen: I was wondering if I should include the name or not, but since I know he doesn't visit these forums (I introduced him to them once, he was less than thrilled) I figured it couldn't do much harm, but if you think it's better to leave out the name I'll remember it for the future.

@fneh: Trust me, it still works that way. ;)

@TBS: I think you're on to something there.

28th Feb 2006, 17:07
Ok, this fits in PERFECTLY, with a situation over here.
A friend of mine, 17, recently hooked up with a 13 year old. Neither has had their birthday yet, this year (so technically, they're 14 and 18). But honestly; they really are a sweet couple. Both of them like Cradle of Filth, and stuff like that, and while he's a huge guy (width-wise... big shoulders too), she's a tiny little girl. And frankly, in my opinion she's VERY mature for her age...

Well, that last line pretty much discarded everything I just said, but... But point being; I don't have anything against it, now when I see it.