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View Full Version : These house parties are getting boring... lets all go RAIDING instead!!!



BeKs
8th Jul 2002, 12:48
Too many house parties make Lara a dull girl, so i thought we could all go on a little adventure.

Lara has phoned a group of us to help with few little things. We are all sitting in a small charter plane, half asleep, not sure where on earth we are going. I'm throwing peanuts at people, im very bored but looking forward to seeing what Lara has in store for us. PLINK *I hit _________ off of the head with a peanut. I duck behind my seat s******ing.

I start to feel a slight pressure in my ears ... we're descending. Ohhh i wonder where we are! I come up from my hiding place, and __________ is scowling at me, i squeeze my eyes closed with my big grin, and open them in time to see a peanut in slow motion hurtling toward my head. OUCH!!!! Right between the eyes too! "Good shot ________" i say, laughing.

I still see nothing but clouds and sky out of the small window, but not for long .... we're comming in to land....


(Carry it on!!! lol)

Prelude
8th Jul 2002, 16:11
As I sat there picking bits of peanut out of my cleavage, I started to get really excited about what lay ahead. Lara’s parties where adventures in themselves, with all sorts of weird things happening, I wonder what a real adventure like this had in store for us? As I look around the plane at the other raiders, Lara, Beks, _______,________, and _________, I couldn’t think of anyone else I would rather have beside me. I knew they were top raiders and good friends and that if anything was to go wrong????? they would be there for me and we could reply on each other. Just then the plane touched down and clouds of dust flew from the wheels, covering the windows, I couldn’t see where we were. Lara stood up and with one eyebrow raised said “Ready? Lets go raiding”.........

LaraCroft_TombRaider
8th Jul 2002, 16:48
Since this was my first expedition ever, i was almost wetting my pants on the plane ride because i was so excited, but also kinda scared about what may lay ahead...Anyway, i used to go to school with lara when i was little, she always picked on me....but now that she's grown up, she really is quite the man's lady.....i find myself quite attracted to her....but back to the adventure......

We all step out of the plane and there is still a cloud of dust from when we landed on that gravel runway. I still don't know where we are.....we all wait for the dust to clear and when it did, it revealed a humungous.......

(finish it!)

Aquarius
8th Jul 2002, 18:58
In front of us lay a giganic volcano off in the distance. Beneath it was miles and miles of jungle."Where are we Lara?" I ask. She doesn't answer right away. "You'll just have to find out for yourself. Now, we go into the jungle."

Solaris
9th Jul 2002, 00:40
Prelude was still struggling to get peanuts of herself when we continuing down a winding path deep into the jungle...
Lara was pinting out some places and things she has shot when we came up to a temple...ruined by natural causes.

Lara hands us some guns and we enter the temple which is lighted by the descending sun above...I walk along side Prelude holding a Flare for light..when then we come up against...

JunoJIm
9th Jul 2002, 03:27
A fire breathing dragon -
http://junojim.homestead.com/files/Dragon_1.JPG
As Lara holds him a bay, we roast our peanuts with his breath.

Beks then suggests we go skinny dipping in the...

Aquarius
9th Jul 2002, 03:30
......nearby lake. "Wait!" We yell out. "There could be electric eels or something in there. Since Lara still won't tell us where we are. Let's not go skinny dipping right this moment. How about we go make some S'mores?? Doesn't that sound good?"

(BTW, that pic is awesome!! :))

THE True Lara
9th Jul 2002, 08:54
Can I just say something....

WOOOHOOO!!! I love this idea! :D:D:D:D!!!


*Everyone starts to walk off. Still grinning broadly at the back of the group, dusting off my charred hat from the peanut roasting a moment ago, (and still finding a few peanuts in it from on the plane...) I suddenly notice a faint rumbling noise getting louder, or closer....
'Odd', me thinks, 'it can't be me, I had breakfast, and you know it's kind of like the noise we're used to hearing when a giant boulder comes after you in one of the games......'
I raise my hand;
"erm, Lara, err.... I hear a rumbling noise, what do I do?"*

thanhkim
9th Jul 2002, 10:18
Run Lara yells as the large boulder comes stragiht for us, nearly wetting ourselves we run like anything. In the plane I was quietly watching the peanuts flying around, I was wondering if one hit Lara what she would have done. I was going to throw one at her but decided againist it since I wanted to keep on her good side. Sweet girl really she is. Now as we ran we came to...

Prelude
9th Jul 2002, 13:57
*What looks like a TOMB!*
"Fancy that " *says Dagger of Xian*
*There are some strange inscriptions on the wall*
*Dagger of Xian holds up the flare while we all try to make out what they say*
Prelude “Did anyone bring beer?”
*They look at her strangely*
“Well all those peanuts have made me thirsty”
*The inscription reads.....


(ps love the dragon)

Solaris
9th Jul 2002, 22:04
Originally posted by Prelude
[BPrelude “Did anyone bring beer?”
*They look at her strangely*

*The inscription reads.....


(ps love the dragon) [/B]

(LMAO)

The inscription read:

La Persona que entra esta Tomba vas a vivir una vida de mala suerte, Muertes le pasa al La familia que toca al rey de los leones!

Translation:(i translated it)(me speaking)

The person who enters this tomb will lead a life of bad luck, Death will happen to the family (of that person) if they touch the King of the Lions!

'King of the Lions?...who's that?" Prelude asks rummiging through Lara's super backpack for beer.

"Not sure..but legend has it that he was a crazed king who thought only the animals trusted him..though he was a great ruler...." Lara said

" Lets go in then!" I said excidetly

" But Bad Luck..and Death!" Aquarius exclaimed

"Oh well....we can do with a bit of that" Thanhkim said.

" How do we get in???" The true Lara asked

Lara then finds a switch she pulls it opens the doors to find.....


(love the dragon!)

BeKs
9th Jul 2002, 22:19
The door opens slowley, Prelude is still looking for beer.
"Lara, all you have is a bottle of Lucozade, i can't believe you have no Bud!!!" she sighs
I whisper to Prelude, "Prelude this is really nasty i dont think i can do it"
"What are you talking about??" she asks, confused.
We all follow behind lara through the door.
"Cant they sue us or something?"
"BeKs .... what are you on about woman?"
"Disney!!!" i proclame "If we kill the Lion king... i thought he was all cute and furry and little ... we dont have to kill him do we... He was good in that film...you know i was even hoping for a sequel... there can't be one if we kill him"
"BeKs........"
"Ya?"
"SHUT UP"
I giggle "Hey, here ya go"
i reach into my pack and throw a beer.
"Cheers mate"

still following Lara we enter a huge hall, it's so dark, everyone is quiet
"hey i dont mind killing the wart-hog" i shout ahead, it echoes around the walls, and as if i had given a command torches light one by one in two lines of fire down the center of the room.

Prelude
9th Jul 2002, 22:41
BUURRRPPP! “That’s better, I mean pardon me”
Dagger of Xian “hey who found the light switch”
THE true lara “I don’t know but I kinda wish they hadn’t”
*The torches reveal the true horror of the tomb they have entered*
*There are skeletons in shallow graves dug out of the walls, like in the catacombs*
Beks “hey do you ever get the feeling your being watched?”
*Then the gang are aware of pairs of red blinking eyes appearing out of the dark corners of the room.......

(PS you guys crack me up, you know me so well. Beks lol :D)

Solaris
9th Jul 2002, 22:41
We see the red eyes but seem not to be actual creatures but the skeletons themselves staring, glaring at us as though to say you dont belong here. Lara apparently not noticng that the red Glaring eyes staring at her exclaimed:

"Look a Switch!!"

"Pull it...wait lets go home....no Pull it" Prelude says

Lara pulls the switch and finds another long hallway filled with skeletons and red glaring eyes as well. As she stepped into the doorway blades began to swish.

*swish shing, swish shing*

"I'll go first follow my lead.." lara said

*Lara jumps over the blades as if it was the easiest thing in the world*
I push Prelude in front of me...She tries to resist. Then we hear Lara's scream and her pistols shooting....

(oh eveyone choose a gun and write on top so we now)

Solaris
9th Jul 2002, 22:45
Originally posted by Prelude
oops posted at the same time.....what happens now, hang on I'll change my story

no dont change it..ill fix mine!

thanhkim
9th Jul 2002, 23:00
Lara I yell where are you are you ok?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JunoJIm
10th Jul 2002, 03:46
NO !!! I'm NOT OK !!!.....................(13th post)
http://junojim.homestead.com/files/Dragon_2.JPG
I'm trying to get the last peanut roasted...toss me another beer, so I can pour it on my head !!! Lara turns just in time to get away from the dragon, and sees...

thanhkim
10th Jul 2002, 11:37
A three headed dog looking eyeballs to eyeballs at her.....

Solaris
10th Jul 2002, 18:29
'Prelude move..c'mon we need to help Lara" I yell trying to get Prelude to cross the blades..

"Ill go first!" Aquarius says..He crosses the baldes and again we hear shots. Then we hear a loud roar and Lara screaming again.

"Prelude move it!!!" thanhkim Yells

"Let Prelude go last..lets go!!" Beks yells..then he too crosses the blades and more shots are heard.

"Well.." The true lara hesitates then crosses and more shots are heard another roar..and more shots from Lara's pistols.

Then LC_TR crosses, Then JunoJIm. Prelude still frozen next to the door.

"Im going Prelude.." I say and at that i left. I then hear Prelude behind me. As me and Prelude emerge from the Hallway we see the Three Headed Dog still trying to get Lara who was safley behind the Gang.

'What the hell is it guarding??" Beks asks

"Dunno..but lets find out after its dead." The true Lara says.

we all cntinue shooting at the Dog..then after a while it drops down dead. We then continue downward..

thanhkim
10th Jul 2002, 20:14
I then jumped down with the others seeing the dog dead I went over to Lara and said, dude you ok. she shakes her head and says keep shooting the dragon, we turn and then go for the dragon once it's dead we go downwards to find a large opening in the side of the wall. We check if everyone is safe and with us and we go forward towards an entrance that leads to an underground beach area how strange,

Aquarius
10th Jul 2002, 20:25
"Now why would the dog thing and the dragon be guarding an underground lake? You don't suppose there's something in the lake, do you?" I say
"There's only one way to find out, but look out for underwater creatures" Lara says
We all start to put on diving gear, which just happens to be laying on the shore.
"Let's hope this equipment is safe....."

BeKs
10th Jul 2002, 20:35
I start to get some essential gear out of my pack while the others are discussing a plan. The water looks so clear and emerald green. "Right here you guys go, you will need it more than me" Lara throws some spare ammo to each of us "We dont know what we will find on the other side of the lake"

"Right I'm all set" i say
Everyone turns around to see me in my scuba gear, yellow rubber duck in one hand, red Bay Watch life preserver in the other, pink dinosaur rubber ring safely around my waist, and my trusty soap on a rope hanging majestically around my neck.

"Lets go" i say and wade heroically into the mysterious depths

THE True Lara
10th Jul 2002, 21:32
The rest of the group, still bemused by Beks, finishes arranging their gear,

thanhkim spits out her mouth piece, spluttering slightly "ewww, seaweed-y"

Prelude passes a small half drunk bud to her, "here, this'll hide the taste.
thanhkim, "where'd you get this, we're in the middle of a jungle cave system!?!"
Prelude just grins.....

Lara stands tapping feet on the shore, "are we ready yet?"

"Yup," Aquarius pipes up, "but what do we do if ther's something underwater that we need to shoot, but don't have harpoons?"

Lara: "Swim. Fast."

"oh"

finally we all start wading off into the water
"Do you think there'll be more fire-breathing dragons underwater?" I ask.

Dagger of Xian; "I didn't think they could breath fire underwater...."

"oh yeah, good point..."

"if there are, they'd better have more beer" -Prelude interjects.

"maybe the Lion King will have some...." Beks calls back from up front, teasingly, before submerging below the surface of the lake along with Lara.
'Why would a lion have beer' I wonder........

One by one we all follow.

As we swim down to the center of the lake for what seems like ages, the waters begin getting darker and darker, when we swim over a large sand bank, and see illuminated before us.....

Prelude
10th Jul 2002, 22:41
......Swampy the sea hag and her collection of gold coins!!!

(Beks you are soooo funny, still laughing http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/images/emoticons/laugh.gif )

Aquarius
10th Jul 2002, 23:15
We're all staring at 'Swampy' wondering who has a Harpoon Gun. BeKs meanwhile is still at the surface, because she can't sink with her rubber ring around her waist. She then pulls out her ______ and starts shooting at Swampy. BeKs thinks she's shooting at Swampy, but she's only shooting at a big salmon, or some type of fish.....

Meanwhile.......

BeKs
10th Jul 2002, 23:32
My super-soaker normally deals out some hard hitting dammage, but it's showing no signs of stoping this mother of a fish, hmmmm i jump onto a near-by rock to get a close range shot. It's covered in slime, i loose my footing. SQUEEEEK, SSHHHHHH Lucky, Dino the pink rubber ring saves me a hard impact on the stoney floor, to my dismay, Dino didnt survive the fall, he hung limp and lifeless around my waist.

"AAAAARRRRRRGGGGGG you stinky big fish, you killed my best friend" i scream

(i wanted to scare the fish and make it sound dramatic, i wasn't friends with Dino at all... i'd never forgiven him for an incident at the local swimming pool)

For some reason no-one appeared to be hepling me, all i could here were s******ing noises. that was the last straw, i loaded a clip of tartar sauce (with extra garlic) into my super soaker, and the fish was dead

(Pictures to come)http://www.renox.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/images/rubberduckey.jpg

Aquarius
11th Jul 2002, 00:02
(LMAO!! That's too great!)

By this time, Swampy is really ticked off because no one's paying any attention to her/him/it/thing. So whatever Swampy is, decides to.....

Prelude
11th Jul 2002, 00:21
......To attack us head on.
“hum phum mmm hur ys” Says Prelude, then realising she is underwater and no one can understand her, also realising she has just taken in loads of water and now can’t breathe. Panicking she swims to the surface where she see Beks struggling to remove the now limp and deflated Dino the pink rubber ring from around her waist.
Prelude now able to speak points franticly into the water and finally translates her garbled message “it’s coming right for us!”
Beks now alerted to Swampy’s presents thinks quickly and snaps the soap on the rope from round her neck and flings it into the water.
Like a torpedo it strikes Swampy on the head and she quickly retreats, whimpering.
Phew everyone sighs and comes to the surface to thank Beks.
“Thanks Beks you saved the day”
We then all pay our respects to Dino
But then....

THE True Lara
11th Jul 2002, 08:31
...we all notice the large the large black tendrils creeping out from underneath swampy's pile of gold coins that was left behind!

As they slide across the coins and lake bed bumping into the now chipped soap on a rope (which it fumbles with curiously) we all watch stunned wondering what it is, how large this thing could be, and just how we were going to deal with it after having so much trouble with a salmon and a sea-hag?! :eek: :confused:

(Beks, Prelued, you girls give me stitches! LMAO :D )

BeKs
11th Jul 2002, 14:31
http://www.renox.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/images/rubberducky2.jpg

BeKs
11th Jul 2002, 15:38
I try to quickly perform CPR (critical puncture repair) on Dino but its no use, its too late. The coins were spilling everywhere as the black slimy arms (or legs) ...(or both) felt their way closer and closer towards us. We all back up as far as we can go, Lara fires a clip off at one of them, it severes onto the sand and bursts into flames. We all take out our hunting knives and start hacking at the monster.

Suddently there is a yelp behind us and Lara is being dragged into the lake. Aquarius runs to help but as he does so steps on a small stone button, a sharp beam of light enters the cavern as a small door opens high in the ceiling. WHHHOOOOSH a huge black cloud of screeching bats fly towards us as we hold onto Lara.

"Oops" says Aquarius
"Someone do something! and be bloody quick about it!" shouts Lara

Solaris
11th Jul 2002, 17:30
As more bats continue to attack us. Lara began to slip away.

"Someone do something!!!" lara yelled angrily

Aquarius still holding on..prelude had been struck with and idea.

"hold on.." prelude then grabs her beer can and the beer can throughs it at the thing thats dragging Lara..as though magic the thing dissolves away..

"what the hell was that??" thanhkim asks

"dunno..how are we gong to get int he cavern??" The True Lara asks.

"Look at the door and the cliff wall we can climb up and get in..." Lara was then interrupted by a sudden shake of the earth under us.....

(you guys crack me up!!http://boards.harrypotter.warnerbros.com/emoticons/lol.gif )

THE True Lara
12th Jul 2002, 22:33
.."ooooohh," says Prelude, "I think I've had one too many bud's now..."

Prelude
13th Jul 2002, 01:14
(Ok guys I can’t get the soding picture to work so you will just have to go here to see it) :rolleyes:

http://hstrial-cgreenfield.homestead.com/files/notice.jpg

Suddenly Prelude notices this sign ^ on the nearby wall.

"Oh no, whatever we are gonna do we had better do it fast, becos I don’t think the huge scary black lake octopus is very happy with us....well me actually for throwing my beer bottle into the lake, and any minute now he is gonna be coming back to get us....well me.....help!


*edit, hey guys I got it to work! thanks Beks :D*

BeKs
13th Jul 2002, 08:41
We all tie a big rope around ourselves - Lara goes first. We satrt to scramble up the rocks towards the small cavern.
"OUCH" shouts THE True Lara "Dagger of Xian! You just trod on my hand"
"Climb faster!!" calls Lara, "that octopus doesnt see to care for graffitti either!! lol" The black Octopus climbes out of the water slowley, it nears the bottom of the cliff reaching up for us

JunoJIm is climbing up infront of me, "go faster" i say, getting a shoulder under his butt and pushing him. "Oi what ya doin! Waaaa, i nearly fell" He grabbed onto Prelude to stop from falling. Prelude stumbles and catches some loose rocks, the small rocks plink down the cliff and crash into some medium sized rocks, they hit some large rocks and the large rock BANGS into a huge boulder! We all watch as the boulder wobbles on its perch. Prelude quickley throws down another beer bottle to help it along.

There is a huge CRASH and we see nothing but a cloud of dust. "Ha hahahaha" coughs Lara. we look down to see the Octopus squashed under the boulder with a bottle of Bud in its mouth.

Lets go! We carry on the climb up to the cavern, its all dark except for a shadowy figure. It's guarding a shiney pile of gold and jewels but most importantly - a key. The thing is moving about on its treasure, and as it turns to look at us we see that its the most disgusting killer mutant squirrel we have ever seen .... well its the only mutant killer squirrel we had ever seen.

It spots our beady eyes in the darkness and prepares to attack, ___________ has a cunning plan!!!
http://www.renox.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/images/madsquirrel.jpg

THE True Lara
13th Jul 2002, 20:40
"AAAGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!"
I scream,
"Squirrels, I hate squirrels, with their stupid fluffy tails and their stupid twitchy noses!!"
and pull out my uzis and begin firing wildly!

Solaris
14th Jul 2002, 00:02
Originally posted by THE True Lara
"AAAGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!"
I scream,
"Squirrels, I hate squirrels, with their stupid fluffy tails and their stupid twitchy noses!!"
and pull out my uzis and begin firing wildly!

(LMAO!http://boards.harrypotter.warnerbros.com/emoticons/lol.gif )

as THE True Lara finishes her nervous break down over a mutant squirrel..we all then continue ahead into yet another jungle. Night then starts to settle in and we have to make camp.

"cant we check in a NICE ho-ho-hotel??" Beks asks Lara now shivering cold since are small expedition in the water. Plus the wind was increasing.

"dont be silly..where in the jungle!" Lara laughed

we all then settle in a small opening. as we all pull open are sleeping bags the unexpected happens..

Aquarius
14th Jul 2002, 00:12
......Richard Simmons appears from the jungle. "Okay everyone! Are you ready to do some sweatin' to the Oldies?!?!"

:D

Solaris
14th Jul 2002, 00:16
"AAAAAAHHHHAAAAAAHHHHHH RICHARD SIMMONS!!" THE True Lara then goes in another nervous break down and shoots Richard with her uzis. Problem was he didnt want to die. he was making us do STRETCHES!

(Someone continue! cant breathe from the laughing!)

THE True Lara
14th Jul 2002, 11:01
"Sorry, sorry," I say, wiping my brow and shaking nervously,
"....but I just hate thay guy!"

"....with his stupid fluffy hair and his stupid twitchy toesies! And the fact he makes everyone exercise! grrr......."

"it's okay, it's okay, I feel better now..." I say finally and idly kick richard's limp foot, and giggle slightly.

Solaris
14th Jul 2002, 17:12
after the weird and hetic night that we had..we all woke up early the next morning. ate a pathetic breakfeast and continued down a trail. we came up to a large cave that seemed to go on for miles.

"Im sooooo hungry!" Prelude shouted

"Shutup! we dont know whats in their,shouldnt wake it up!"Lara scowled at Prelude

we all enter the cave. Lara lights a flare, we all follow suit. As we continue down the cave..things seem to be getting mushier under us.

*gurgle, gurgle* "Help!" Beks yelled.

We all try to pull out Beks but we all seem to be in the same situation.

"what is this stuff??" I ask

'Quicksand' Lara responds quickly.

"How the Hell are we going to get out of here??" JunoJIm asks

(by the way..im leaving tomorow at 2 a.m. to D.R...I might get on lata to say a last goodbye. Not gonna see you people for a month! im gonna miss you:( !!!!!!)
(oh hope the story goes on great..if someone can please send me the rest of this stroy..my email address is in my profile. Dont send the sig pics though.)
(i might get a hold of a PC over there..if the light doesnt go out! see you aug. 20! Miss you already:( *im a pathetic saying this??*)

Prelude
14th Jul 2002, 17:56
Prelude “Well I’m not sinking that quickly, maybe its something to do with the fact I have a empty belly and I’m starving, I mean if I had had a proper breakfast I would be heavier wouldn’t I, and if Aquarius hadn’t stolen my ONLY sausage and left me with just a measly portion of s………”
“WILL YOU SHUT UP ABOUT BREAKFAST!!! “barks Lara “AND THINK ABOUT HOW WE ARE GOING TO GET OUT OF HERE!”
“oooooo well I shut my mouth again shall I” Prelude adds quietly “especially as there isn’t any food to put in it…”
All “SHUT UP!”
Dagger of Xian “guys this isn’t helping” looking down as her knees are disappearing into the quicksand
THE True Lara “everyone stay still, I think that helps?”
Aquarius “yeah and everyone hold hands”
Prelude “well if you want my opinion….”
Lara “Prelude if I want your opinion I will ask for it….wait, I will never want your opinion!”
Prelude “Fine! I was only going to say that Beks is really close to that over hanging branch from that tree over there, why doesn’t she try and grab it and pull us out, but if your not interested then I'll SHUT MY HUNGRY MOUTH!!!”
The gang look at each other in silence, finally Lara says “Beks, can you reach that branch hanging over you”
“Yeah” Beks replies “but I’m only gonna do it if Aquarius throws up Preludes sausage and gives it back to her”
Prelude giggles
The others look shocked at Beks and then at Aquarius, who feels sick at the thought of it
Beks “only joking” she reaches for the branch….


(ps We will miss you too Dagger of Xian :( Hurry back :D )

Solaris
14th Jul 2002, 18:02
Originally posted by Prelude
Prelude “Well I’m not sinking that quickly, maybe its something to do with the fact I have a empty belly and I’m starving, I mean if I had had a proper breakfast I would be heavier wouldn’t I, and if Aquarius hadn’t stolen my ONLY sausage and left me with just a measly portion of s………”
“WILL YOU SHUT UP ABOUT BREAKFAST!!! “barks Lara “AND THINK ABOUT HOW WE ARE GOING TO GET OUT OF HERE!”
“oooooo well I shut my mouth again shall I” Prelude adds quietly “especially as there isn’t any food to put in it…”
All “SHUT UP!”
Dagger of Xian “guys this isn’t helping” looking down as her knees are disappearing into the quicksand
THE True Lara “everyone stay still, I think that helps?”
Aquarius “yeah and everyone hold hands”
Prelude “well if you want my opinion….”
Lara “Prelude if I want your opinion I will ask for it….wait, I will never want your opinion!”
Prelude “Fine! I was only going to say that Beks is really close to that over hanging branch from that tree over there, why doesn’t she try and grab it and pull us out, but if your not interested then I'll SHUT MY HUNGRY MOUTH!!!”
The gang look at each other in silence, finally Lara says “Beks, can you reach that branch hanging over you”
“Yeah” Beks replies “but I’m only gonna do it if Aquarius throws up Preludes sausage and gives it back to her”
Prelude giggles
The others look shocked at Beks and then at Aquarius, who feels sick at the thought of it
Beks “only joking” she reaches for the branch….


(ps We will miss you too Dagger of Xian :( Hurry back :D )

(ill try..ur so funny!)

Beks reaches the branch

"good now lets grab beks legs and we can climb up that ledge right there' lara points at it

"what!? no ones climbing up me!!" Beks yells

"YES THE ARE OR ILL SHOOT YOU DOWN!" Lara barks pointing her pistols at Beks.

"fine..last time ill ever do this" Beks whispers

Prelude then goes furst still complaining of how hungry she is. Aquarius the goes still stating that sausauge was his. The goes the True Lara when all of a sudden..

V_Croft
15th Jul 2002, 08:51
V_Croft approaches looking very tired...
"Hey! Why did you leave me at the plane?" She holds her head. "Oh dear, I have a terrible headache... You see, I was trying to unfasten my seatbelt when i was hit by something on the head...
( B]Quote[/B] :posted by BeKs: PLINK *I hit _________ off of the head with a peanut. I duck behind my seat s******ing. )

...Everythig went back... and when I woke up I was alone... and I decided to try and find you. Thank god there were some traces; peanuts and beer cans *Prelude is looking around*...
So I found you!

Prelude:" You scared me to death!!! I'm so upset now and..."
V_Croft:"Eh, em, I thought you all might like some beer... I took some with me and some food, too..."
Everyone smiles broadly. Prelude starts muttering:"Oh, I can't believe it, it's so..."
Lara: All right. come up here and we'll eat quickly.
I climb up the tree being helped by BeKs.
I take out the beer and some food. Prelude grabs a beer. V_Croft:"Take mine, too, I don't drink"
Cheers!
http://www.videogame.it/emoticons/images7/drink.gif
(lol, Prelude, you can put that smilei in your sig! j/k :D )

"Oh, I forgot to tell you: I foung this papyrous near a dead three-headed dog ("Pfff, tha thing stinked!"). It has some strange ancient symblols and something like a lion or ...whatever. Does it belong to anyone of you?"
Lara takes it. "It's pretty vague but...well all I can say is... (continue)


( @Dagger of Xian: Bye bye! CU again in August! :D )

Prelude
15th Jul 2002, 11:35
(gee thanks V-Croft, they are soooo cool)

(BTW nice entrance. But did a peanut really knock you out!!?? :confused: Oh what the hell although everything in this story it true and really did happen, I guess you can call it artistic licence, carry on)

Oh and cheers again
http://www.videogame.it/emoticons/images7/drink.gif

BeKs
15th Jul 2002, 12:43
(Maybe my peanut throwing is the nut lobbing equivalent of the Vulcan neck grip? If it hits you in the right spot - WHAM - you're out cold!) ;)

Lara takes it "It's pretty vague but ... well all i can say is...

... "it's sort of an Ancient copy of Playboy, OMG that's disgusting!!" she says staring at the paper. We all look at eachother, confused. "Oh....... hang on a sec .... noooooo... i was wrong - i was trying to read it upside down" Lara spins the paper around, blushing.

"Har-har, you sure you just been drinking Lucozade Lara?? i reckon you've been on the booze!" laughs Prelude

I turn to V_Croft to appologise for giving her concussion,

"Hey V_Croft, I'm really sorry about before, glad you're okay and caught up with us all." I extend a hand
"No probs..... next time ill kill you though" she says shaking my hand firmly. I grin.

"I shouldnt play with peanuts." i say casually. "With all my training i forget they are a deadly weapon in the hands of a trained professional like myself"

I fold my arms firmly across my chest "Did i mention i was a black belt olympic 'Death-peanut' Artist??" i say proudly
"Erm ..... no ... no you didnt" ......

"okay guys ive translated the paper" "It says something about an ancient dance which summons the King of the Lions when perfomed in the Feline Temple, the map shows it is about 3 clicks from here. Lets go"

I walk at the back of the line, im getting bored. "Dance!!!" i whisper with a s****** "I'd have bought my tamborine and my morris dancing ankle bells if i knew"

We enter a low corridor, Lara pauses as if she senses something, then continues down the passage. All of a sudden cracks start to appear in the ceiling and a low growling noise can be heard. Dust and small rocks fall through the gaps now widening above us. We all start to run, coughing and choking, to the end of the path - Dead end - we had come the wrong way!!!!

The ceiling is shaking and big chunks start to fall, we all huddle against the wall, then the whole ceiling caves in and with it comes a HUGE........

THE True Lara
15th Jul 2002, 13:47
Originally posted by BeKs
(Maybe my peanut throwing is the nut lobbing equivalent of the Vulcan neck grip? If it hits you in the right spot - WHAM - you're out cold!) ;)


I've got to say I prefer Vulcan neck grips, you can't accidentally eat the whole packet of them and run out of ammo...... ;)

eh hem, sorry, where were we?

oh yes...




The ceiling is shaking and big chunks start to fall, we all huddle against the wall, then the whole ceiling caves in and with it comes a HUGE........


........Can of Calsburg Export!

Prelude wakes up the find everyone looking down at her on the floor.

"You okay?", asks Beks's

"We thought you'd be out for ages when you got hit by that chunk of falling masonry...." I finish.

Prelude look up at us rather sadly.... "it was sooooo big" she says.

We all look at each other rather confused an a little shocked,

".okay......" say's Lara and we all turn round to survey the sight the cave-in has revealed......

V_Croft
15th Jul 2002, 13:56
THE true Lara:"It's a secret room"
JunoJim:"It looks like an ancient temple or something..."
Lara:"C'mon, let's explore".
BeKs:"Are you sure it's safe?"
"I guess so..."


(Hey BeKs, calm down a little girl, you almost killed me with that peanut! Serious 'bout that... ) (lol :D )

Prelude
15th Jul 2002, 14:16
......gigantic man eating MOLE!

http://hstrial-cgreenfield.homestead.com/files/mole2.jpg

“Oh my god!” Exclaims V-croft
“It’s hideous!” Adds Dagger of Xian
“Is this it guys? Did we really come all this way to be eaten by a huge gigantic man eating mole!” Asks THE true Lara
The gang stand huddled together as they await their doom
Beks turns to Prelude and says “cover your eyes, don’t look at it honey”
Just then Lara has an idea “wait, I have an idea!”
Lara walks slowly round the huge gigantic man eating mole the others look on in horror
Aquarius “what are you doing come back”
But Lara manages to walk unnoticed right passed the huge gigantic man eating mole.
She signals to the others to follow, cautiously they proceed.
When they are safely on the other side Lara grins and exclaims
“It maybe a huge gigantic man eating mole, but it still can’t see a thing!!”
The gang laugh and proceed
Meanwhile Prelude now unable to hear the other’s presumes they have been eaten and opens her eyes, to see they have gone, she stand alone facing the huge gigantic man eating mole “hey that’s not fair, why didn’t you eat me as well, don’t leave me alone, what’s the matter you don’t like beer" *Prelude throws another beer bottle and smacks the huge gigantic man eating mole right on the nose it snarls and starts heading towards her* “that’s it you oversized fur ball, EAT ME!”
As the huge gigantic man eating mole moves closer, Prelude decides even in the interests of feeling left out that maybe she doesn’t want to be eaten after all.
“HHHHEEEELLLLPPPPPP!!!!!!”…..

(continue)

Prelude
15th Jul 2002, 14:19
Oops sorry guys I posted this after Beks, don't know what happened there. I think if you put mine before THE true Lara's is still makes sense???

BeKs
15th Jul 2002, 14:44
Ya hehe can still work - the thought of being eaten by a mole (huge very scary looking killer mole) made you faint, we all run from moley and come back to find you one the floor having dreams about HUGE cans of beer, then we look around to find the small secret temple room ......

(love the mole btw LOL)

Prelude
15th Jul 2002, 15:21
......yeah either that or THE True Lara's chunk of falling masonry, knocked me out and I was dreaming about the whole mole thing and about beer of course :D

Aquarius
15th Jul 2002, 16:07
(okay, so we're in a secret temple room???)

The Group steps into the small secret temple room, to see that it's filled with monkeys. Hundreds of monkeys!!
"Well, I guess the room isn't that small." Lara says, while looking at one particular monkey that is completely white, and has red beady eyes..........


(BTW, for future food related adventures, lol, I do not eat meat!!)

Prelude
15th Jul 2002, 16:37
Originally posted by Aquarius


(BTW, for future food related adventures, lol, I do not eat meat!!)

oops sorry :( but anyway they were Vegetarian sausages, ok :D

continue....

thanhkim
15th Jul 2002, 20:11
The monkeys all turn to look at the group. Without any notice they charge the group. Thanhkim begins firing and all the other join in. Once all the monkeys are dead we continue to explore the area and we find a coffin inside is a girl who looks identical to Lara! She wakes looking straight at Lara and

continue story

Aquarius
16th Jul 2002, 02:34
........is getting ready to grab Lara's guns, when suddenly the look alike is tackled by a gigantic creature.........

THE True Lara
16th Jul 2002, 09:48
"Oh for crying out loud, what is this the Lost World or something!!" I exclaim, "right, that does it, I've had enough of giant creatures, I'm not moving another inch 'till someone find me some archaeology!" and I sit down on the floor, crossing my arms stubornly.

the group turn to look at me, bemused

"what!" I say, "leave the double to kill the monsters!"

"are you sure you didn't get hit on the head too?" mutters Prelude quitely...

again the group look bemused and turn back round to see how the fight as progressed between the double and the creature.....

thanhkim
16th Jul 2002, 10:11
The double won and went over to Lara and gave her a hug. With her arms around Lara she said, you are mine. And they both vanished..........

THE True Lara
16th Jul 2002, 14:27
"Oh great" I yell, "Now who's going to kill the monsters!"

Aquarius
16th Jul 2002, 19:38
Simultaneously, the group all points at THE True Lara to deal with the monsters.

THE True Lara, gets up, thinks about running to the door, but then realizes there is no door. So she decides she will fight the freak monster thing. She starts to walk over to the monster, and pulls a ladle from her back pocket. "I didn't want to have to use this, but looks like I'll have to......."

:D

Aquarius
17th Jul 2002, 03:37
*nudge nudge*

thanhkim
17th Jul 2002, 17:43
I ask as I'm watching The True Lara where's Lara! What happened, once The True Lara is finished we have to find her, I'm not leaving until she is safe!

Mean while Lara and the double re-appear at this place like no other, Lara tries to struggle but the double is much stronger than she is and bangs her in the head knocking her out cold. The double then takes Lara and puts her into....

continue story

THE True Lara
17th Jul 2002, 22:23
....a frightening looking chair -something a kin to what you'd find at the dentists but scarier, metal, and with nasty looking straps and implements of torture. What could the double be up to?.....

---------------

Mean while, I return to the group -having finished off the creature,- I'm covered in something I can't describe and still clutching the now mangeled and bent ladel.

"Right, next time, I get stand around like a pathetic girl and you guys can deal with the monsters!" I say shaking my ladel at the group, "I don't like to be violent, but sometimes..... well, after all there is a logical use for violence.... and what's done is done, and no amo wasted."
I look at the ladel and sigh slightly,
"I don't suppose there's time for a cup of tea before we look for Lara?...."

dgx2001
18th Jul 2002, 18:56
Hey guys im back, said i would be.
anyways, here it goes:
_______________________

As the chopper got near the volcano, i decided to paradrop down.
"i just hope Lara didnt get here first. Whatevers in that volcano is my treasure this time." i say as i put the chopper on auto pilot and jump out. While im going down, i noticed a charter jet in the distance. "Lara always gets to the treasure first..... o well, i might as well find her and help her" i said with a sigh as i landed right outside the huge firepit. "Well, i better start looking".......

Prelude
18th Jul 2002, 19:57
(Welcome back dgx2001, you might want to check your private messages!)

Prelude “Sorry THE true Lara no time for tea, here have a beer instead”
JunoJim “So gang whats the plan?”
Thanhkim “Well we need to find Lara”
“Do we have to?” Everyone looks at Beks, “Hey I was just kidding”
LaraCroft Tombraider looking around “Where do we start?”
Prelude “I don’t know, start look for a spaceship or something”
All “Huh?”
Prelude “Well she was obviously beamed up somewhere, people don’t just vanish! Start looking for Captain Kirk, maybe the other Lara was a hologram, or maybe its really Seven of nine”
The others look bemused at Prelude
Finally Aquarius says “Ok back to the real world, how do we find her?”
Just then the gang here Lara screams “HELP ME, I’M IN HERE”

Meanwhile.....

Lara “who are you?”
Lara2 “I’m your twin sister, we were separated at berth”
Lara “yeah right like I’m falling for that one, if you’re my twin sister then let me go”
Lara struggles against the restrains
Lara2 “Ok so I’m not your twin sister, your less gullible then I thought, I was created to take your place”
Lara “Created? Take my place, great what happens to me?”
Lara2 “Subject is terminated!”
"Don’t think so" says Dagger of Xian, as the group arrive in the door way and unload several rounds into Lara2
Lara “Thank god you guys, she’s a psycho said something about being created to take my place”
Aquarius helping Lara up, “no one could take your place Lara”
Lara “ah you’re so sweet”
Beks “err I think I’m gonna be sick”
Just then Lara2 gets up again, there are sparks coming from the bullet holes in her face and chest
V-Croft “hey look at that! Lara2 is some sort of robot!”
Prelude “Cool a Larabot!” Prelude laughs at her own joke and looks around to see no one else gets it “Get it? Lara Bot, you know like its Lara and she a robot, hey like Buffybot from Buffy the vampire slayer, or it could be Cyberdian systems model 102 ha ha yeah Arnie’s sister, *impersonates Arnie* ‘I’ll be back’ or maybe she’s Borg, we are Borg prepare to be assimilated.....hey wait up guys where you going?”
Prelude turns to see Larabot coming for them, the others are running away, "Hey wait for me....."

dgx2001
18th Jul 2002, 23:23
After looking around for a bit, i see the rest of the gang running from something. "whats going on?" i ask. "RUNNN!!!!"
i see a someone resembling Lara runing towards me. She stops.
"Wait, hold on a sec, if Lara's back there, who are you?"
She knocks me down. I draw one of my pistols, which she crushes with one hand. "Okay, uh, that explains it" I get up and run as fast as i can to catch up with the others.

dgx2001
19th Jul 2002, 04:33
*smacks into concouisness*

V_Croft
19th Jul 2002, 06:30
Prelude:"I'm telling you, she's a Borg or a robot, an Android, a..."
Everyone shouts simultenously:"Shut up!!!"

V_Croft:"How are we goig to kill that thing?!"
Aquarius:"No idea!"

Prelude:"Right, if you don't want to listen, then don't, but then it's bad for you ... And...
BeKs:"Can't you stop muttering? DON'T you see we have a problem here?"
*Lara2 is approaching...*

THE true Lara:"Oh dear, HELP!!!"

Prelude her sleeves and shouts:"IT IS AN ANDROID! CAN'T YOU SEE THAT???"
Junojim:"So what?"
Prelude:"We actually can kill it! with WATER!

*Everyone looks at Prelude...*

Thanhim:We must find some water immediatelly!

*We start looking around...*

V_Croft:"Hey, what's that body over there?"
*We notice dgx2001's body*

*Lara picks starts slaping him on the face*
"YAY, what's up?"
Lara"Run!"

dgx2001
19th Jul 2002, 06:43
"What the hell are you doing here?!" Lara asks.
"what do ya think im here for? when we get outta this, you have to tell me how you get to arachological sites before me."
"We have bigger problems than puzzles right now" says V_croft
Lara2 was gaining on us.
"so ive noticed!"
"Do you have any water, d?" Lara asks "Yea, but not alot, here"
i toss the canteen to Lara. She douses Lara2 with the water.
Lara2 stalls for a second then......

THE True Lara
19th Jul 2002, 08:20
....places her hands on her hips, annoyed, "Oh come one, you didn't think that was going to stop me did you!"

We all look at each other confused, then realise we need to start running again. So we do!

Prelude: "well it would have worked with a normal robot!"

Me:" Yeah, but Data went swimming in Insurrection and he didn't turn into Mr Rust bucket...."

Lara: "We need ideas please..."

Prelude: "oooh ooh, I have a better idea, how about sea water like in Day of the triffids, or failing that the common cold like in War of the Worlds..."

the rest of the group begin to moan....

Aquarius: "no wait, that's a good idea, we'll get her cold, we'll freeze her! Now all we need is some liquid Nitrogen, and.... oh, yes, right......"

Beks: "Well maybe we could do the opposite, and cook her?!"

Dagger of Xian: "Yes, but is she flamable?"

Me: "I say we keep trying till she konks out!"

Lara: "Okay, someone pass me the flares, it's time for a roasting..."

Prelude
19th Jul 2002, 09:27
Prelude “Ooo roasted LaraBot, yummy! With potatoes, and gravy and....hey guys I’m hungry”
Aquarius “How the h*ll can you think of food at a time like this!!!!”
Prelude “Well I don’t what to die on a empty stomach do I”
Lara “No one is going to die, except that THING!”
THE True Lara “You mean you”
Lara “NO not me, that thing doesn’t look anything like me, I mean look at those abnormally large breast, sticking out, I mean no one has breast like that!”
The gang frown and look at each other
V-Croft “Whatever you say Lara”
Thinhkin “Lara dear, don’t bite my head off or anything but what exactly are you planning to do?”
Lara “erm use the flares… to erm… roast the thing!”
Dgx2001 “Lara I hate to be the one to point this out, but I think it will take more than a few flares to ‘melt’ the Larabot, metal has to reach very high temperatures before that happens” dgx2001 ducks in precaution to the punch he is expecting to receive for this comment, strangely it doesn’t come
Prelude “Yeah what we need is some" *Doing impression of Dr Evil* “liquid hot MagMa”
JunoJim “oh yeah and where are we going to get that exactly??!!”
Beks “No wait, she’s right, come on guys this is essentially a ‘Volcano’ right, so there must be some larva round here somewhere?? Lara you’ll always jumping into larva pits when you’re not suppose it, maybe Larabot will do the same!” Beks adds under her breath “she is you after all”
Lara “WHAT!?”
Beks "I said she won't survive the fall!"
Lara “oh”......

thanhkim
19th Jul 2002, 10:25
We find a river of lava running a long stream with bobbing bits of stone to stand on in the middle of the stream, I say look Lara here's the river you wanted. Lara tell us what to do we then all proceed to jump across. Once everyone has made it Lara is the last to come and the Larabot is after her. Lara starts to jump and just makes the end. I give her a high five and say nicely done dude, the Larabot does the same but unfortunately it does a perfect jump from stone to stone like Lara does, we grab Lara and run like hell with the thing gaining on us, now what I say to Lara..............

continue story

dgx2001
19th Jul 2002, 10:53
"Aw, the hell with this!" i say as i turn around and unload my ammo into Larabot. When the bot is just about to fall into the flaming hot lava, i run out of ammunition. "no, not now!!!!!" i yell as Larabot recovers and starts chasing us again. "Nice work, Eienstein, have any other bright ideas???" Lara says.
"Two things, one, if i had more ammo it would be dead now. secondly, RUN!!!"

dgx2001
19th Jul 2002, 10:55
just forget my last post. sorry

BeKs
19th Jul 2002, 11:54
We run quickly to a fork in the path,
"Oops did i drop that when we were having dinner?" says THE true Lara
"Who cares!!" shouts Aquarius "Keep going"
We start off again, the Larabot chasing after us. Running to a junction, Lara decides to go left, we all follow, panting and very out of breath.
"No! its another dead end" i cry as we come to a small room, "No doors out!"
We turn to face the oncomming Larabot, she stops a few meters in front of us laughing. Backing against the far wall Lara swears at the bot under her breath.

"Mwuhahahahahaha, time to be replaced by a younger model!!!" the Lara bot chortles insanely.

dgx2001 turns to me and whispers " Look at the Larabot's back.... she got a big red OFF button!!" "Oh yeah!!!" i reply "How did we miss that?"
"Pass the message along to Lara" dgx2001 says
I pass the message to V_Croft, V_Croft whispers to Prelude, Prelude to Thanhkim, and finally Thankhim edges across to Lara and says, "Are you okay Lara?!?" ..... "Oh by the way, the Larabot has an OFF button on her back"
"Ahhhhh" saus Lara grining

Prelude
19th Jul 2002, 14:07
Originally posted by BeKs
Thankhim edges across to Lara and says, "Are you okay Lara?!?" ..... "Oh by the way, the Larabot has an OFF button on her back"

He he http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/images/emoticons/laugh.gif Nice one.

dgx2001
20th Jul 2002, 03:25
Lara hits the off switch and Larabot starts to spasam uncontrollablly and falls into the burning hot magma below.
"Well, now that thats over with, lets go look for whatever's in this volcano" i say. "okay, lets go." BeKs says as we descend deeper into the volcano......

THE True Lara
20th Jul 2002, 09:15
..."you know", I start to mumble as we continue into the volcano, "...you know, it's a shame you killed the Larabot.."

everyone stops and glares at me :mad:

"..well, I mean, you could have done all the raiding and the Larabot could have done all that ponsing aound for your publicity...?"

thr group carry on....

"what,....?" :confused:

Prelude
20th Jul 2002, 12:45
Prelude starting to feel a bit sorry for LaraBot "I guess we could have re-programmed her”
THE true Lara “yeah, then she would have been good, and she might have might have helped us defeat the giant monsters!”
Prelude s******s
Aquarius stops and so does the group again “what are you talking about, there is only one Lara”
He looks at Lara for approval
Lara "aw your so sweet" she kisses him on the cheek
Beks “I think I’m gonna be sick again”
The gang continue on
Prelude “hey guys did I mention I was hungry?”
All “YES!”
Prelude “oooo well I’ll shut my mouth again”

V_Croft
20th Jul 2002, 14:30
THE true Lara:"Right, where were we? What are we supposed to do now? We can't be wandering around searching for a lion thing or whatever... So, where do we go?"

Prelude:"To a restaurant..."

Lara:"Well i guess we'll have to... " (continue)

dgx2001
20th Jul 2002, 19:11
Me: "Lara , i hate to be a smartass, but were in the JUNGLE! There are no restaurants out here!"
Prelude: "Owwww, im starving!"
All: "WE KNOW!"
I reach into my pack, pull out a Twinke, and toss it to Prelude, who devours it.
I look to my right, and notice a portion of the wall is a different color.
Lara: "What are you doing?"
Me:"Hold on"
I kick the wall and it opens to revel a secret passage.......

THE True Lara
22nd Jul 2002, 08:57
".ccoooooooooeeeeeeeeee......" Beks yells into the darkness, and is promptly hit by a twinke wrapper!

"uphry y thrph rw umphy umpth mhrs mhmuph" says Prelude,

tha gang "what?" :confused:

"I said," begins Prelude finishing licking her fingers, " don't you think we've encouraged enough monsters already today? I want to eat food, not be food!"

Lara looks a little guilty, "well we could try being, erm, stealthy?"

"Cool!" starts Beks.."like James Bond, but erm, in a, err, jungle....?"

dgx2001: "Well could we hurry up and be stealthy sometime soon, I'm running out of twinke's and I don't know how long Prelude is gonna hold out!"

we turn to see prelude eyeing up dgx2001 backpack,
Prelude: "you mean you have more in there...!"

Lara: "Erm, lets go shall we?"

Thankhim: "I shall go first Lara, there could be more monsters!" and cracks open a flare and strides off into the now semi-illuminated dark.

"After you..." I say, bowing theatrically to Aquarius and V_Croft.

After walking down the passage way for some short time we eventually catch up with Thankhim who's come to a standstill.
"Look what I found,!" She says, grinning widely and pointing infront of her,
so we look,
and see.........

Prelude
22nd Jul 2002, 14:05
The gang from a circle and pear down at the item
Prelude jumps up and down behind them struggling to see what it is “What is it? is it food?”
THE True Lara “its................Dog poo!”
Prelude stops jumping “Well I’m not eating that!”
Beks sarcastically “Oooo that’s great thanhkim, how useful, well we’ve found the treasure everyone, we might as well all go home, good job gang”
Prelude s******s “yeah can we go now, I know this really nice little restaur….”
She is cut off by thanhkim, “not the dog mess you fools! There look next to it.....”
“Oh” the gang say moving in closer to see……

Aquarius
22nd Jul 2002, 18:50
......the smallest dog in the world ever. "That tiny little thing made that big mess? Wow!! Here little guy, you're so cute!" As Prelude moves closer to the little dog, it gets a bloodthirsty look in it's eyes. "Umm, petting it might not be such a good idea........"

THE True Lara
22nd Jul 2002, 21:38
"ohhhhhh, wait a minuet there.." I begin, "that's the exact same look the rabbit in 'Monty Python and the Holy Grail' had in it's eyes! I'm going anywhere near it! Someone else can play pooper-scooper!"

dgx2001
23rd Jul 2002, 03:17
Me:"Well, you guys can stay here with the attack dog and his droppings, but im going on ahead."
V_croft:"Its a girl, dude"
Me:"I dont give a damn!"
Lara: "I agree with d, we have to keep moving"
Prelude:"What about the dog? We cant just leave her here."
I take out a tranquilizer gun and fire it into the dog.
Me:"Take the dog."
Prelude picks up the dog and we start walking through the passage......

THE True Lara
23rd Jul 2002, 08:22
Up head we see a small opening, and after sqeezing through, we find ourselves to be in a large cavern, but the celing is covered with vines, all hanging down, (but being so large and cavernous, the longest of vines stop way above our heads).
Infont of us the ground peeters away into a large walkway/bridge which leads to a large roughly circular platform (natural, not manmade) on which seems to be a pedistool of somekind, though we can't see what's on it from this distcance.
Suspiciously, right above this pedestool area there's a large dark hole in the celing where all the vines seem to disapear up into.
Far underneath the walkway is a gently bubbling pool of magma, intersperced with staligmites.

The group stand stunned by the view for the moment.

"I think you'll find this is the cavern where the lava will collect before being expelled out during an erruption" says Lara.

Beks; "there won't be one while we're here will there!?"

Prelued s******s at the back.

"Well, I guess it's fairly obvious where we're meant to go next." says dgx2001

Prelude: "Yeah, to a..." before she can finish V_Croft finally blows, and pulls Prelude back into a head lock, one hand silencing her.
"Don't say it! Just don't, no more about food, geddit!"

Prelude nods in agreement, slightly scared. And V_Croft lets her go.

Lara stands slightly stunned for a moment, "Okay, then. Well if we're all finished now, shall we continue?"

All: "Yes!"

We begin to walk tentatively across the walkway, trying not to look a down at the drop beneath us.

Me:"I wonder what's actually on the pedestool..?"

Beks: "Could eb we've finally found the Lion King at last!"

Aquaruis: "Nah, too small....."

Prelude, worried: "erm.... has anyone ever seen Indiana Jones.........."

V_Croft
23rd Jul 2002, 09:30
THE true Lara starts signing a song. BeKs joins her and so does Prelude. Aquarius and dgx2001 try to close their ears. Like being in another world, I'm looking around at the place. Prelude hits me on the back "Hey, what's up? are you ok?... Hello???"
I: "huh? What? Did you say something?"
Prelude: "Hello? Are you with us? You seem to be somewhere else, you know..."
I:"Oh, I was just thinking, that if we could..."
suddenly lara shouts: "RUN! The bridge is collapsing! We shouldn't have crossed it all at the same time!"
We start running as the bridge is collapsing under our feet...

dgx2001
23rd Jul 2002, 10:59
We all manage to get to the other side in time except Lara, who is dangling from a rockface.
Me:"Take my hand!"
Lara loses her grip and starts falling.
I look in my pack for something i could use
Me: "Aha! My grappling gun!"
I fire at vines, hooking into the ceiling, and jump down after Lara.
I grab Lara's hand just before she hits the pool of magma below.
After the others pull us up, Lara smiles and laughs.
Lara: "Its weird. If you did something like this 11 years ago, i would think you were just trying to be a hero.
Me:"And now..?"
Lara: "Now that i know you better, i realize... it was just a really stupid thing to do."
We both laugh.
Me:"Your welcome":D
Beks: "Okay guys, are we going up?"

dgx2001
24th Jul 2002, 16:36
*smacks into conciusness*

THE True Lara
24th Jul 2002, 17:47
Originally posted by dgx2001
*smacks into conciusness*

:D

"Wow!" I say loooking at the item on the pedastool, "I ddin't think it would be that!"

dgx2001
24th Jul 2002, 17:56
Me:"What is it? If its another dog..."
TTL:"What is it with you and dogs?"
Lara:"d has never been one for dogs"
TTL:"How can you not like dogs?"
Me:"Ill tell ya after we get outta this, but what is it the item?"
TTL:"Its...

THE True Lara
24th Jul 2002, 21:27
"It's......"

dgx2001
25th Jul 2002, 09:00
*sigh*:(

THE True Lara
25th Jul 2002, 09:21
Originally posted by dgx2001
*sigh*:(

...I know...... well in the words of Professor Plum "Looks like it's just you and me honey-bunch"


back to the story.....

*the gang peer down in amazement......
"It looks like a frozen pea!" say's Beks.
"That's ridiculous!" I start, "how could it be frozen inside a volcano, and anyway peas aren't indiginous to this part of the jungle...."
"Well, what is it reeeeeeeally, then." Aquarius asks.
Prelude: "I say we take now and find out later!"
"A woman after my own heart" say's Lara as Prelude reaches out and picks up the pea.
Suddenly the whole cavern begins trembelling....
"was that really such a good idea?" asks dgx2001
"Perhaps it was a sacred pea!......" says Beks.
"well how many everyday items do you put on pedastools in the middle of giant grandiose caves?!" adds V_croft.
".....or maybe the Lion Kings dinner......."

As the cave begins to quake more and more we notice that the vines from within the huge celing hole were starling to come down and uncurl themselves as if something were about to come out.....................*

V_Croft
25th Jul 2002, 10:22
V_Croft:"Right... hmmmmm... WHERE DO WE GO NOW ??? http://www.videogame.it/emoticons/images1/015.gif There's no bridge... not anymore... it has collapsed!
the gang look at the nearby cave.
THE true Lara: "Something is in the there... I'm not going in there!"
Lara:"We have to. And quickly, we don't have much time! Everything seems to be collapsing..."
Prelude:"I'm am not going in there... NO WAY! What if the Lion King is there? I want to eat something-I'm starving-I don't want to be eaten!!!
dgx2002:"Sorry dear, no other choice!"
We all rush into the cave... It's very dark and there's a strange sound...

(continue)

Prelude
25th Jul 2002, 14:45
“What’s that rumbling sound?” Asks Aquarius
They all turn and look at Prelude
“Its not me!” She exclaims
THE True Lara “Well you obviously have a bottomless pit for a stomach”
Prelude “yeah maybe but it doesn’t make those sort of noises, besides it’s nothing that a cream cake wouldn’t fix”
“Where’s it coming from then?” ask V-Croft
The gang begin to look around the cave cautiously
Lara “look!, guys come here”
Lara holds a flare to the cave wall
Dagger of Xian “what is it?”
Dgx2001 “It’s a riddle”
Lara reads “The prince awaits beyond this door, you must hold the key if you want to explore, to find out if you are a true princess, place the ??? here to gain access”
THE true Lara “huh?”
Dgx2001 “place the what?”
Lara “I don’t know, the writing is missing”
Beks “Ooo wait, I’ve got it, it’s the princess and the pea riddle”
All “What!”
Beks “never mind, it’s a fairy tale, something about sleeping on a pea!”
V-croft “yeah I know that one, what’s that got to do with this?”
JunoJIm “don’t know about you guys but I could do with a nap!”
Thanhkim “That’s funny becos I thought you were asleep, you haven’t said anything since we left”
JunoJIm “funny!”
Aquarius “I thought we were looking for a King not a Prince”
Lara “wait look there’s a tiny hole here, maybe if we put the...............who’s got the pea?”
They all turn to look at Prelude.
Prelude is lost in her own thoughts of a huge cream cake, with icing and jam and....mmm........

*goes to fridge* Someone else continue.....

V_Croft
25th Jul 2002, 16:24
THE True Lara: "Prelude, I don't believe you've eaten the pea!!! How could you do that?! Shame on you! It's just so irritating... I don't believe it...

Prelude:"But..."

TTL:"...we've got so far and now there's nothing we can do... we will starve to death..."

Prelude:"Ehmm..."

THE True Lara:..just because you've eaten the pea!!! AND I WAS SO HUNGRY!!! You could have shared it with us!!!

Aquarius:"Relax! It's a pea, don't you see? A PEA! For god's sake! We would have divided a pea into 10 pieces???! Are you nuts or what?

Prelude:" I didn't eat it!!! Believe me!"

Thanhkim:"Ehmmm, sorry for interrupting... but ...ehmm I have the pea... I was just taking a look at it...

The others look at her.

Lara:"All right, let's see..."

She places it in the tiny hole...
I and BeKs together:"IT FITS!"

...

Jraider3000
25th Jul 2002, 17:58
The door opens, revealing a dark tunnel.
Lara lights a flair and heads down the tunnel until she comes to a choice to go left or right.
V_Croft "Which way?"
Lara "hmmm....right."
Everyone heads down the tunnel until they come to a door.

All of a sudden Jraider3000's closet door opened revealing a group of people stareing at him.
"This is the 8th time I've said this today! The Prince is to the left!":mad:
Lara "Sorry. Bye then"
(continue)

Jraider3000
25th Jul 2002, 18:04
"and by the way. I bet your gonna try to kill the lion king. Well, everyone that's tried has died so far. Why does everyone wanna kill my kitty!:( "

THE True Lara
25th Jul 2002, 21:14
*Grins,* "Hee, hee, Narnia type wardrobe, how cool is that, and there wasn't even a lamp post and bicycle...!"
-the group glare at me,
"what did no one read CS Lewis when they were a child?"

Lara:"Look, we're not making much progress, lets just get back to the intersection and take the left turning, shall we."

"fine...." moans Beks, "but I still don't see what peas and wardrobes have to do with Lion Kings....."

Prelude: "Or lunch......"

dgx2001: "what did he mean; 'everyone that's tried has died so far'?!..............

Jraider3000
25th Jul 2002, 21:23
Jraider3000 noticed that Lara Croft was in the group and begins to realise that they might actually kill his kitty.
Jraider3000 takes two desert eagles and puts them in holsters. "Well we can't let them do that now can we?" Grins evily. (Hey looks like I'm the bad guy:D )

Jraider3000
25th Jul 2002, 21:35
Jraider3000 takes a secret passage to one of the rooms ahead of the raiders and notices a spike trap that's barely visible.
Remembers seeing one of the raiders holding a beer can. "Hmmmmm...Idea!" Carefully places a 12 pack on the spike trap without setting it off and grins evily. Then he runs off looking for more traps to set for the other raiders.

dgx2001
25th Jul 2002, 22:02
Prelude:"Its sure dark in here... im scared..."
Me:"Its just the dark, it wont hurt you."
Prelude:"Im hungry... no one should die on an empty stomach..."
Lara:"Relax, were almost there."
Beks:"Hey guys look, a 12pack!"
Me:"Wait!" i shove Beks back.
Me:"why would someone leave a 12 pack of beer in the middle of the room?"
I fire a few rounds into the pack and the spikes pop up and go back down again.
Aquaris: "Thats why!"
We step over the trap, walk into the next room, and see J raider setting another trap.
He fires a few rounds at us ducks behind a stone pillar.
Me: "Ill take care of this guy, you get the Lion."
Lara:"Well, hurry up."
The others keep going while im left in the room with Jraider.....

Jraider3000
25th Jul 2002, 22:18
("Go get the lion"-dgx. Keep in mind there was a prince or something mentioned.)
Rolls out from behind pillar and shoots dgx in leg. Then runs for it while dgx lays on the floor.
dgx "i've been shot. Anybody bring a first aid kit?"

Jraider3000
25th Jul 2002, 22:39
Jraider3000 was running through a strange room when he noticed something sitting on a pedastel.
It looked like a magnefying glass almost. Jraider picked it up and ran it over some symbals on the wall to try it out. As he did a strange voice read the words. this startled Jraider at first then he continued to run it over the rest of the symbals.
The voice "He who enters the Lion King's Tomb shall awaken the prince of wings. The prince of wings shall then hunt down the intruders one by one and destroy them."
That didn't sound good. What did it mean by the prince of wings? Could this thing fly? Jraider and the rest of the "intruders" were about to find out.

dgx2001
25th Jul 2002, 23:39
I take a piece of cloth and tie it around my wound to stop the bleeding.I walk (somehow) into the next room and hear the strange voice saying "All intruders will be ahhinialated by the suprem power of the prince of wings"
I sneak past Jraider, take out my shotgun, and open the door to the next room. I see what looks like a gryphonfighting the rest of the gang. I dump 8 shells into the shotty, and rush into the room......


(if ya dont know what a grypon is, play warcraft.)

(wait till someone else posts now, Jraider)

Prelude
26th Jul 2002, 00:19
(Huh what the frig is going on here???)

Dxg2001 limps up to the others
Lara “oh my god, you’ve been shot, here have a medipack”
Dxg2001 “it’s ok I’ve got one, if someone could just get it out of my backpack for me”
Prelude eagerly “I’ll get it!”
V-Croft “What the hell was the thing?”
Aquarius “Beats me”
Prelude hands the medipack to dxg2001
Prelude "uphry y thrph rw umphy umpth”
Aquarius “Prelude are you eating again?”
“No!” Prelude says swallowing quickly
Aquarius “Yes you were you were eating something”
Prelude “I wasn’t!”
Dxg2001 “Where did you get that?”
Prelude “I…erm...I found it”
Dgx2001 “You found it?…Where exactly did you find a Twinke in the middle of a cave?”
Prelude looking guilty “I don’t know, I just did!”
V-croft with a grin “Maybe Batman gave it to her”
Prelude agreeing quickly “Yeah that was it, Batman gave it to me”
Dxg2001 “why you little......”
Lara “GUYS! can we get on do you think?”
The gang continue on
Prelude and Beks follow on behind
Beks “I can’t believe we left the 12 pack back there, what do you say you and me go back for it, I could really do with a beer?”
Prelude “rw umphy umpth mhrs mhmuph”

Jraider3000
26th Jul 2002, 03:37
*meanwhile batman soared away*

Aquarius
26th Jul 2002, 03:54
(okay, I managed to follow everything up until now........)

The group continues walking, watching Prelude too, make sure she doesn't have anymore beer or food. "Okay, okay! I had food that one time!! ONE TIME!! Stop looking at me like that!!''

Suddenly, from the ceiling drops down Richard Simmons again! THE True Lara screams out, "NOOO!! YOU SOB!! I KILLED YOU!! I KILLED YOU!!"

"Okay everyone, let's do some stretches!"

Meanwhile everyone starts to go for their weapons......

"I'm a pony! I'm a pony! I'm a pony! Come on! Come be a pony with me!"

Just then, Martina Navritalova swings in from somewhere, and takes out Richard Simmons, beating him with her incredible forehand. "Man he's annoying!" :D

After Martina is finished with Richard, she leaves the cave. I go running after her, "Martina! Wait for me!! Take me to Wimbledon!!!" I disappear into the darkness trying to find her........

"Well that certainly was different" mutters Dagger of Xian
"Mphfmphfhp?"
"Prelude!! That's it! Hand over the food!!" screams Lara
"What food? I don't have any food......and shouldn't we see where Aquarius disappeared to. I have a bad feeling......."


:D (had to fit Martina into the story somehow! She's awesome!!)

Jraider3000
26th Jul 2002, 04:07
Jraider is wandering through dark tunnels when he bumps into Robin.:eek:
"What are you doing here?"
"Batman left me here he's such a jack a**."
"Wanna help me save my kitty by killing lara croft and a bunch of other raiders?"
"What's in it for me?"
"I'll give you a dollar."
"Ok then."

THE True Lara
26th Jul 2002, 07:55
As we continue along the group begins to hear a kind of metallic clacking sound, very rapid, and almost as if it's getting louder, though it already seems quite close....

Lara stops everyone, okay, "what the hell is that noise?!"

The group follow their ears and turn see me at the back, still clutching my guns, but my arms are shaking so much they're knocking against each other.

"Woah," say's Prelude, "do you need a beer too?!"

Me: "No, no, I'll be fine," the shaking begininng to stop, "I just keep thinking I'm going to see Richard Simmons again.....!" (the clacking mometarily getting worse at the mention of his name.)

"There, there," says Prelude putting an arm around my shoulder (and reaching into my backpack in search of food) "Simmons is gone now, everything will be fine..."
"o, o, o, okay......" I say say, nodding jerkily
"shall we put the guns away for now....?"she suggests.
"o, o, o, okay......"

and we walk on......

V_Croft
26th Jul 2002, 08:34
THE True Lara trembling:"Are you ... sure...ehm...he's... gone?

Prelude:"Yes, of course, i'm telling you he's...."

Suddenly they're interrupted by someone that bumps into THE True Lara.

TTL:"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARG! HE'S BACK HE'S BACK"

Prelude:"Relax, it's Aquarius! Hey, were have you been?

Aquarius being out of breath:"I was after her, but I missed he. But I found another rather strange room...

Lara: let's go explore.

THE True Lara
26th Jul 2002, 11:28
*shakes in a nervous psychotic way*

Jraider3000
26th Jul 2002, 20:38
Jraider and Robin are walking along when they all of a sudden fall through the floor to find themselves slideing down a dark tunnel.
All of a sudden they fly out through a trap door in a wall and land in a large pool of water in a room lit by torches.
Jraider and Robin climb out of the pool and search the room to find no exit.
Jraider "Great...this is just great."

V_Croft
27th Jul 2002, 09:10
Sorry, no more ideas left...

P.S.I'm going away on holiday for one week...
'm gonna miss you all :(
And I'm curious to see how you'll be doing with the story! :)
So, c ya next week! :D

dgx2001
27th Jul 2002, 17:21
i have no ideas either:(
anyway, ill see ya next weekl

Aquarius
27th Jul 2002, 17:37
(looks like I'll continue.......)

We come into a large underground lake.

"Great, not another lake" says BeKs, "And I don't have poor Dino to help this time........."
"It looks like there's a boat or something in the middle." Says Prelude, as she tries to eat more food unnoticeably.
"Actually," starts Lara, "It's a Royal Barge. Everyone, welcome to the tomb of Princess Ling Chou Wong Fou."
From somewhere in the cavern we hear "Confucius says........"

THE True Lara
28th Jul 2002, 19:19
I don't believe it, I've spent all day at a medieval Murder mystery event and no one's posted! I'm shocked and ashamed, where is everyone! Right, lets attempt to get back on track.....




"I don't get it," says' dgx2001 "how do you know it's the tomb of Princess Ling Chou Wong Fou?"

"well, erm, it's engraved on the marble floor slab infront of you.." answers Lara.

We all look down...

"oh yeah....."

"So what now?" asks Prelude, swallowing another mouthful of food.

"Do we swim over the barge?!" asks V_Croft

"Do we find some other way to get on the barge to avoid more sea monsters?!" asks Beks, still thinking back to poor departed Dino..

"Do we find who ever's rambling on about Confusious and shut them up??!!" asks Aquarius "they're driving me mad!"
-the rest nod in agreement...

"Aren't we stil looking for the Lion King or something...?!" I finish

Aquarius
28th Jul 2002, 20:02
Hey I posted!! I didn't want to at first, so as not to have two plots things in a row...........

"Yeah, we're still looking for the Lion King, but we need to find the guy who's going on about Confucius. I bet anything we'll find he or she on the barge. And we'll maybe find the Lion King along with them, or at least find something out." I say

"Hey look at that!!" shouts Prelude "A conveniently placed boat that all of us can fit in to go across the lake! Wow!! How about that! What are the odds?!?!"

"Probably not good for us. And what have you been smoking??"

Prelude's too busy jumping up and down in joy over at the boat. "We have a boat!!! We......no, I have a boat!!!"

With that, Prelude hops into the boat and starts to go across the lake.

Meanwhile, under the waters surface, and entire school of aquatic Richard Simmons fish are awakened by Preludes lunatic screams. And they're mad. Too mad to even do exercises!!!

:D

Jraider3000
28th Jul 2002, 20:18
Jraider and Robin serached thr room for about twenty minutes when Robin noticed a brick in the wall that was sticking out slightly. He pushed it in and all of a sudden a section of the wall slid away revealing a tunnel.
Jraider and Robin followed the tunnel to a room with a large spiral staircase going down into darkness.
Robin and Jraider headed down the stairs into a room with many holes in the ceiling which vines were hanging through.
"Jraider." a deep voice said.
Jraider looked toward the voice to see cats eyes, about the size of a dragon's, glowing in the darkness.
Jraider "Hello, Master."
Robin "Ya-You know this....uhhh....thing?"
Jraider "Robin, meet the King of the Lions."
Robin "Your kitty!?"
Jraider "Oh please you don't actualy think I really refer to this thing as my kitty? He gave me immortality. And I can keep it as long as I protect him and he dosn't die."
Lion "Jraider, the raiders are getting close. You must kill them all now. No traps just find them and kill them all!"
Jraider ".......yes master."
Robin "Jraider are you serious! I can't do this! Keep your stupid dollar! Can't you see this thing is evil!" All of a sudden the Lion's head popped out of the darkness. The Lion grabbed Robin in his jaws and pulled him into the darkness.
Lion "Now Jraider. Go...and...kill...them...all."
Jraider "Master-"
Lion "Kill them all!"
Jraider started to leave the room.
Lion "Jraider are you following my command? Jraider? Jraider! You shall follow my command or your imortality shall be taken away!"
Jraider "...The hell with imortality." Jraider fired a few shots into the lion's face and sprinted out of the room as fast as he could as the Lion King roared in anger.

Jraider3000
28th Jul 2002, 20:21
(I know that sounded kinda corny but I felt like bein a good guy-Even though you guys will probably blast the hell outta me once u see me lol)

THE True Lara
29th Jul 2002, 08:15
erm, so is the lion King dead? Probably not, so I'll continue with that in mind...

"Aaaaghhhhhhhhhhhh, not the Simmons, NNNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!" I scream frantically trying to scrabble up the cave walls. "Preluede why, why didn't you leave me with my guns!!!!!"

"What's she on about this time?" someone asks

"It's Richard Simmons, HE'S COMING!!!!":eek:

"What, is your Spider-sense tingling, or something?!" asks Beks' sarcastically

at that moment the first few ranks of the diving-school begin to emerge, causing Prelude to fluster even more, rocking the boat furiously,

"Don't shake the boat you'll fall in!" yells Lara, not that Prelude is paying any attention.......

"what's a fitness wacko doing with a diving school anyway..?" asks V_croft.

Aquarius "Haven't you ever heard of Aqua-aerobics?"

"Aghhhh, umph, agh, take that! urgh, ah, and that! arugh!" I yell, -now picking up stones, sand, and anything I pick up and hurling it at the Simmons followers, advancing forward......

"So, we gonna help?" V_Croft says,
"Nah, I've still got to find that Confuscious person, have you noticed the mumbling has gotten louder?" Aquarius replies.
"Probably to content with the racket in here!"
"humm...... maybe, maybe not. It's giving me a hell of a headache though!"
"Do you mind if I come along?"
"Sure."
and with that V_Croft and Aquarius go off to do some more productive raiding.

Mean while Lara has taken out her uzis and begun a bombardment on the advancing divers,
"They don't seem to die!" she yells back to anyone who can hear her, "it's unnatural! We have to find a way to kill them!"

Beks, "Yes, but how...? What could possibly kill such creatures of pure evil as these?!"

thanhkim
29th Jul 2002, 10:30
I started singing and with that the evil creatures started to die, everyone including Lara told me to shut up cause I'm a shocker of a singer. But then Lara see's what is happening and she starts singing too. Of course I just look at Lara and shake my head cause if I'm a shocking singer she is just bloody awful.

THE True Lara
29th Jul 2002, 13:40
is it any particular song? ;)

Jraider3000
29th Jul 2002, 14:38
(No the Lion King is not dead. I doubt a couple shots would kill a dragon sized monster. If they would this adventure would be alot more easy that's for sure.:D)

Aquarius
29th Jul 2002, 16:05
Originally posted by THE True Lara
[i]and with that V_Croft and Aquarius go off to do some more productive raiding.


Woohoo!! Not only is raiding, it's productive raiding :D

"We've been wandering around in the dark for hours!" says V_Croft, "We'll never find anything"

"Umm, it's been 5 minutes. What are we looking for anyway?? We just kind of wandered off......."

"The Confucius quoting person, or whoever. Aren't we?"

"Oh yeah! Where do we even start looking to begin with? Wait, what was that??"

From the darkness of the hall/tunnel comes the sounds of the sick wet thumping of feet.

"I think there's something coming after us.'' whispers V_Croft "You don't think it's one of those Richard Simmons freak fish things, do you?"

"I AM NOT A FREAK FISH!!"

Just then, a light flickers on, and standing in front of us is the real Richard Simmons!!!!

"AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"

Our eyes bulge out, and we start to run.

"Wait, wait, wait! This isn't right. Okay, Simmons, get over here! Okay, first, V_Croft, we need a blood-curdling scream from you. Then Richard, we need a really deep evilish laugh from you. OKay?? Then we run, got it?? Okay, let's try this again. Now, I think Richard you had just lit the light......."

A light flickers on, and standing in front of us is the REAL Richard Simmons!

"AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!! Bloodcurdling scream!!!!!"

"BMWAAAHHHHHAAAAHHHAAAAA Evilish laugh!!!!"

We take off running with Richard Simmons close behind. "Now that was better......."

:D

Jraider3000
29th Jul 2002, 16:18
(:eek: Jeeze are you people trying to give me nightmares or what!)

THE True Lara
29th Jul 2002, 17:31
LMAO :D

Jraider3000
29th Jul 2002, 18:29
Jraider was wandering down dark tunnels when he bumped into an ugly creature. "I'm Swampy the sea hag! BLAAAAAAAAAAA!"
"........ok."
":mad: BLAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"
"Is there a point to this bla stuff?"
":mad: :mad: :mad: BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"....ok. Will you please move, now."
"Never! BLAAAAA-"
"Will you please shut up!" Jraider stomped on the Hag's foot and it ran off whimpering (once again).
Jraider continued down the tunnel only to bump into Richard Simmons as he tailed Aquaris and V_Croft.
Jraider "Boy this is really my day! :eek: "

THE True Lara
30th Jul 2002, 19:43
Pack in the cave, the rest of the gang pick through the bodies of the Simmons zombies.

"You know," begins Prelude, "this kind of reminds me of 'Mars Attacks' when they play the record and all the aliens's heads explode 'cos they can't stand the singing..."

"eh hemm.... yes, well, so why do you think they were doing down there?"asks Beks,

"Pass" I say,

"what do you mean 'pass'?"

"I mean, I don't know"

"you don't know what 'pass'means?

"no...."

"then why did you say it?":confused:

"no, I mean, I don't have an idea of why they were down there" :rolleyes:

"oh...."

"Isn't it obvious? They were protecting something!" interjects lara, in the nick of time. "I think Richard Simmons in more involved in this than we all previously thought..."

*dramatic pause as Lara mentally strokes her chin in thought....*

at which moment Aquarius and V_Croft come running in screaming rather theatrically....:eek:

Prelude
31st Jul 2002, 01:16
V_Croft and Aquarius run past the others screaming “he’s coming, he’s coming, HELP!”
Prelude “Oh for god sake this guy is really beginning to annoy me”
The gang see a look in Prelude they have not seen for a while
Beks “Oh no she’s really pi**ed off now”
The gang begin to back away. Prelude is usually the one who eats a lot, drinks a lot of beer, burps a lot, and generally messes about, but when she is mad, run for cover!!!
Richards Simmons is running straight for her, as he reaches her she holds out her hand and says
“STOP!” She blows the hair away from her face (he he, sound familiar?)
Richard Simmons just stares in amazement.
Prelude then produces from behind her back and from nowhere it seems, the biggest rocket launcher you have ever seen.
Without warning she points it straight at Richard’s head, BOOM!!
Richard is blown into a million pieces.
“Oo that was messy” Says V_Croft as parts of Richard drip from the ceiling.
“Gee thanks Prelude” Says TTL
Prelude “Think nothing of it” wiping Richard’s guts from her face “consider him EXORCISED!”

THE True Lara
31st Jul 2002, 09:25
All of a sudden, I rush up to Prelude and fling my arms around her,
"THANK YOU! thank you thank you!!!" I say :)

dgx2001
1st Aug 2002, 04:11
As we board the boat, TTL stalls for a second.
TTL:"wha..what if there are more zombies in the water??"
I dont respond, just show TTL a hand grenade, and throw it down into the water. BOOM!!
The gang: "What the hell are you doing?"
Me:"Thier all gone now, ok?"
TTL: "o..o..okay.."
When we got to the other side......

THE True Lara
1st Aug 2002, 09:03
.....there seemed to be nothing but a shear cliff infront of us!

"Oh great!" says Aquarius, "now what do we do?!"
"Do you have anymore o those handgrenades?" I ask dgx2001,
-patting me on the shoulder, "I told you, the zombies are all gone now..."
"no, I mean't we could blast our way through, I think I can see light coming through a crack in the wall..."
"That may not be necessary," interjects Lara, walking over to the spot in question, "look!" she says.
and we all peer at what Lara is doing, as she traces the edge of the rack and pulls it out, revealing yet another passageway!!!
"Oh, no, not another one....." :D
"We'd better find the Lion king soon," says Beks, "cos I'm getting rather cranky!"

THE True Lara
2nd Aug 2002, 12:39
I'm a little lost now, and I don't mean in these endless caves and tunnels...

Prelude
5th Aug 2002, 00:29
What happened to the other posts? :confused: I thought there was something about caves and tunnels post here?

THE True Lara
5th Aug 2002, 11:55
In the words of Dr Who:

"This can't be, how it ends?!!"




Originally posted by Prelude
What happened to the other posts? :confused: I thought there was something about caves and tunnels post here?
Yeah, I thought so too? :confused: I think someone's been having fun with the delete button?

Will the adventure ever be finished? Or will we be left wandering the caves and tunnels for ever.....?

Prelude
5th Aug 2002, 13:53
Someone needs to put some life back into it and come up with an idea. I'll see what I can do TTL. But I'm not finishing this one, I finished the last two!!!! :D

thanhkim
5th Aug 2002, 15:22
Following the tunnel what do we fine.... the end of what looks like a very large I might add well larger than Lara's hair the longest braid you have seen. Brown in color I say Lara what is the deal it looks like your hair? We begin following the knots of the braid. 5 hours later we still all walking along it looking at Lara, she looks at me and says what it's not my hair. We come to a part in the tunnel where the braid goes up. We all decide to climb it and see if it leads anywhere. After about 10 hours later we get to the top and can you believe the bloody thing is still going. The knots are all like Lara's like big hair brown balls. We stop and make camp next to the braid. Seeing the view we see it curling along I say does this thing ever end...... After about 3 days of walking we come to the end, Lara eyes nearly fall out of head right in front of her is a giant version of herself. Sleeping on the largest bed one has ever seen. My God I say it's you Lara! Holy Cow!

continue story

V_Croft
5th Aug 2002, 16:23
Thankhim starts shouting:"It's you Lara! AHHHHH!"
I:"Hey, wake up! Relax! It was a nightmare!"
Thanhkim:"What, you mean we haven't been wandering in tunnels and tunnels and..."
I:"Nope. Geez, just a nightmare; you dozed off while we were searching"
Thanhkim:"Phew..."

I turning to Aquarius:"Now what, shall we follow this secret tunnel, search for that "voice" or..."
Lara:"I'd say follow the tunnel"
Aquarius:"We'd better split up... I go with V_Croft and Prelude to search for that... "voice" and you go explore the tunnel..."
Lara:"Ok, good idea"
THE True Lara:"Yea, but DON'T BRING ANOTHER SIMMONs BACK!!!"
I:"Don't worry"

I, Aquarius and Prelude go back the boat, while the others procced into the tunnel. While we're chatting about that freaky Richard and his zombies, Jraider3000 comes suddenly from the corner and goes over to Prelude.
Prelude:"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! He's going to kill us! HELP! HELP!"
Aquarius kicks him on the leg.
Jraider3000:"No, no, stop"-he gets another punch from me-Prelude is still screaming- Jraider drops his gun. "Look! I've dropped my gun. Please listen..."
I:"Okay, talk and be quick..."
Jraider starts telling us about the Lion King his x-immortality, their argument, etc...
When he finishes-Prelude-"And why on earth should we trust you?"
Jraider:"Because you have no other choice!"
Aquarius pointing his gun at Jraider:"Oh, really?"
Jraider starts trembling.
I:"no, hold it. what if he's telling the truth?"
Prelude:"Hmmm... We'll have to decide whether to trust him or not..."

In the meantime, the others wander into the tunnel when BeKs notices...

(Continue both stories...)

THE True Lara
7th Aug 2002, 08:27
a broken stone tablet on the floor,
she picks it up and trys to read it;
"triangly thing, straight line, swiggly thing,......"
the group come back in from the tunnel,
"what are you taking about?!" asks V_Croft.
"well that's what it says!" retorts Beks holding up the tablet.

Lara rushes forward, "Do you know what this is!"
"It's a lump of stone" replies Prelude, "...you know they have the best stone-baked pizzas at.."
"But do you have any idea what this means!" interjects Lara.
the group: "No.."

"It means.........."

THE True Lara
8th Aug 2002, 22:31
(Where is everyone? I'm all alone! *sob* everyone else must have been eaten by the lion King, ...or Richard Simmons... I'm the only one here! Don't leave me all alone!!! http://help.microsoft.com/!data/en_us/data/messengerv46_msn.its51/$content$/cry_smile.gif )

Prelude
9th Aug 2002, 01:05
Originally posted by THE True Lara
(Where is everyone? I'm all alone! *sob* everyone else must have been eaten by the lion King, ...or Richard Simmons... I'm the only one here! Don't leave me all alone!!! http://help.microsoft.com/!data/en_us/data/messengerv46_msn.its51/$content$/cry_smile.gif )

I'm here my dear, but it's 2.00 in the morning and I'm going to bed. I will try and think of a responce and post it tomorrow. I guess what I'm saying is, I'll sleep on it :D

http://216.40.241.68/contrib/edoom/sleeping.gif

THE True Lara
9th Aug 2002, 08:46
:)

Prelude
10th Aug 2002, 03:11
….Prelude:....... The pizza’s off????
Lara promptly turns and punches Prelude in the face
Prelude “Ow that really hurt”
Lara continues “It means…..
“shhhusssssssss”
TTL “What was that?”
They all turn to look at Prelude
Prelude “What!”
Dgx2001 “Prelude are you drinking beer?”
Prelude “yeah I opened a can, but you can’t have any”
Suddenly the gang faces change to a look of horror
Prelude “What! So I had a beer, big deal”
V-Croft pointing “be…be…be..”
Prelude “yes a beer”
Aquarius “be…hind….you”
Prelude “oh that old one, you say look behind you then I look behind me and you guys steal my beer, sorry not falling for it”
Prelude takes another mouth fall, she is suddenly aware that the gang are backing away from her.
Prelude “Whats wrong with you lot, it just a beer for god sake?”
TTL points again “be….be…be…”
Prelude slowly turns round and standing right behind her is........

Aquarius
10th Aug 2002, 03:20
And standing behind her is the biggest head of iceberg lettuce that you've ever seen!!

"Oh, My, Gawd!" screams out Prelude, but in the way that Janis does on Friends. :D 'What is that?!?"

"I'm a head of iceberg lettuce for your information! Girl, you betta get it right, or you're gonna be sorry." The iceberg lettuce says this with a ton of attitude, which absolutely drives Prelude crazy!

Prelude: Bring it on!!!


Meanwhile the group just looks at each other with confused looks. "So is this lettuce thing gay, or what??? It talks like it is......."

Prelude
10th Aug 2002, 08:55
Aquarius you know me too well


Originally posted by Aquarius


Prelude: Bring it on!!!



This is exactly what I’d say!!!!!! He he nice one.:D

dgx2001
10th Aug 2002, 14:17
didnt we spilt up? V_Croft , Prelude and aqaurais went after that voice, and the rest of us when for the lion king!
Prelude and aquaris arent supposed to be with us!

Prelude
10th Aug 2002, 17:39
Originally posted by dgx2001
didnt we spilt up? V_Croft , Prelude and aqaurais went after that voice, and the rest of us when for the lion king!
Prelude and aquaris arent supposed to be with us!

See above dgx2001,


Originally posted by THE True Lara

the group come back in from the tunnel,



I thought by this TTL ment we had joined up again? However nothing has been said yet about us meeting Jraider3000.

dgx2001
10th Aug 2002, 19:00
I guess it does mean we met up again
but u could have put it another way
and i dont know bout Jraider

Prelude
10th Aug 2002, 21:53
It wasn't me it was TTL (THE True Lara)

dgx2001
10th Aug 2002, 23:05
wasent talkin to u lol:D

Prelude
10th Aug 2002, 23:15
Pardon me all over the place, I'll shut my mouth again then shall I :D

dgx2001
11th Aug 2002, 13:25
"O tas it girl, u crossed tha line!"
The lettuce grabs Prelude by the neck and both of them vanish.
Aquaris: They vanished!?? Whats goin on here?!
Beks:You dont think they got beamed away do you?
TTL:Thats ridiculous! This isnt Star Trek!
Me:Great! Now we have to look for her too!
Lara:EVERYBODY! SHUTUP!
the gang enters silence instantly and looks at Lara.
Lara:Thank you...... Ok This stone says.....

THE True Lara
11th Aug 2002, 17:50
Originally posted by Prelude

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by dgx2001
didnt we spilt up? V_Croft , Prelude and aqaurais went after that voice, and the rest of us when for the lion king!
Prelude and aquaris arent supposed to be with us!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

See above dgx2001,

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by THE True Lara

the group come back in from the tunnel,

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I thought by this TTL ment we had joined up again? However nothing has been said yet about us meeting Jraider3000.

Originally posted by dgx2001
I guess it does mean we met up again
but u could have put it another way
and i dont know bout Jraider

Sorry, my bad, I must have missed that bit when I only had to time skim read it through last week, I keep forgetting just who exactly is with us on this trip, so I resort to using the names most familiar to me... :(

You have my most profuse applogies, it won't happen again.

And I know we met up with Jraider3000 a good few posts back,
Originally posted by V_Croft
While we're chatting about that freaky Richard and his zombies, Jraider3000 comes suddenly from the corner and goes over to Prelude.
Prelude:"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! He's going to kill us! HELP! HELP!"
Aquarius kicks him on the leg.
Jraider3000:"No, no, stop"-he gets another punch from me-Prelude is still screaming- Jraider drops his gun. "Look! I've dropped my gun. Please listen..."
I:"Okay, talk and be quick..."
Jraider starts telling us about the Lion King his x-immortality, their argument, etc...
When he finishes-Prelude-"And why on earth should we trust you?"
Jraider:"Because you have no other choice!"
Aquarius pointing his gun at Jraider:"Oh, really?"
Jraider starts trembling.
I:"no, hold it. what if he's telling the truth?"
Prelude:"Hmmm... We'll have to decide whether to trust him or not..."
what's become of him since I know not....


P.S. How did you know I'd reference to Star Trek?! ;)

Prelude
12th Aug 2002, 00:47
Prelude wakes up “oh my head, that’s the last time I buy cheep beer” She hears a noise in the darkness, she reaches for her Beretta to find she has been stripped of her weapon, looking around she picks up something and arms herself, “who’s there?” a figure moves into the light, “oh its you Jraider3000, you scared me there for a minute”
JR3000 “What’s that?” JR3000 points to Preludes hand
Prelude “Nothing” says Prelude hiding the object behind her back
JR3000 “Did you just threaten me with a carrot”
Prelude “No!” JR3000 turns around and Prelude quickly eats the evidence
JR3000 “So did you tell the others of our plan?”
Prelude “nooocrunchhnotcrunchyetcrunch” JR3000 looks at her strangely, Prelude swallows “No not yet, we were going to but then Lara find this stone thing and got all excited, and then this giant Lettuce thing appeared and starting given me attitude.....”
JR3000 cuts her off “oh no, it’s Sane’s Berries”
Prelude “no I think it was an Iceberg, anyway don’t you know it’s rude to interrupt, so then the Lettuce grabs me.....wait a minute” Prelude looks around to see she is laying in a pile of giant Lettuce leaves “Ha! guess I wasted that over grown Greek Salad”
JR3000 “I’m afraid not” JR3000 informs her “He will be back and it looks like you are the main course”
Prelude “Are you trying to tell me I’m going to be eaten by a giant gay Lettuce!!!???”
JR3000 nods “unless we can get out of here, yeah”
Prelude “oh well that’s just typical, I come on this adventure with Miss Croft and before I know it I’m being turned in to salad cream”
JR3000 “that’s the least of our problems, if my suspicions are correct The Lion King has released his Salad minions on us.....”
Prelude interrupts “wait back up, exsqueeze me, baking powder, did you just say ‘Salad minions’?”
JR3000 reluctantly “yeah”
Prelude “are you telling me the all mighty powerful Lion King has Salad minions?”
JR3000 “yeah”
Prelude “not ravage beasts?”
JR3000 “no”
Prelude “wild dogs?”
JR3000 “no”
Prelude “huge gigantic man eating moles?”
JR30000“NO! Look The Lion king is a vegetarian, he can’t stand meat, he only ate Robin becos he thought he was a tomato covered in mustard”
Prelude starts to giggle “he, he is a vegetarian, he, he doesn’t like meat, ha, ha, he thought he was a tomato...... hahaheheha...... BBBAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAAHHA!!!!” Prelude is now rolling on the floor clutching her stomach in fits of laughter.
JR3000 “This is serious”
Prelude “Bahahahha, tomato! Bhahah”
JR3000 “You don’t understand your friends are in trouble”
Prelude “Bhahah Yeah they might get eaten by a giant radish! BAHAHAHHAWWWW”
JR3000 “Would you just.....
Prelude “BWAHHAH radish! BWWWAHHHH”
JR3000 “can you just.....”
Prelude “BAWWWA with dressing! BAWWHHAHA”
JR3000 “just......”
Prelude “HAHAHAHEHEHEHAHAHA and cucumber.......”
JR3000 kicks Prelude in the stomach.....
Prelude “BAHAHH........ooo!”

Meanwhile back with Lara......"ok the stone says.....

Aquarius
12th Aug 2002, 01:46
(LMAO!!! That's too great Prelude :p)

Meanwhile, Lara says, "HEY!!! I'm reading the stone here!! Listen up! It says, and I quote, Eat your veggies, or they'll eat you."

"Great" mutters TTL, "Does this mean more gay lettuce?"

"Who knows" Aquarius says, "But we should probably watch out for giant kosher pickles."

Just then, histarical laugher fills the cavern, or caves, or whatever they are.

"Guess we just need to follow the laughing to find Prelude, sounds like she's drunk of her (insert a word, I think you know which one....) again." says Lara. "To the Croftmobile!"

"Umm, do you mean the donkey?"

"Yeah, to the donkey!!"

"Right.........."

THE True Lara
12th Aug 2002, 09:00
After a few minuets....

"Hummm, arn't we going a bit slow?" I say looking down at Donald the donkey -aka the croftmobile- as he strains to walk under the weight of 5 crofteers and Lara herself, all perched upon his back.
-So far we'd reached the lightening average speed of 3cm a minuet!
"Well, yes, I suppose....." says Lara.
"Ah, erm, wouldn't it just be quicker if we got off and walked?"
"Humm. okay, ..Yes....."
At which we all dismount and Donald promptly collapses with relief.
As we continue -more quickly now- we round a corner and find three spiral stair cases disapearing down into the ground.
"Can anyone tell which one the laughing is coming from? V_Croft asks.
We all look blank....
"Okay, since there's an equal number of us that's divasable by 3, I suggest we split up into pairs and each take a staircase." Begins Lara.
"What an odd thing to say..." whispers Aquarius.
"Right, Thankhim with V_Croft, Aquarius with TTL, and dgx2001 you're with me. Any complaints?!"
Thanhkim begins to raise her hand looking unhappy at not being with Lara. -dgx2001 doesn't.
"Let's go adventuring then!" Says Lara chirpily...
"arn't we already doing that though......?" I say elbowing Aquarius.
"Ow!, that hurt!",
"Sorry."
And each team gradually begins to decend the staircases....

Aquarius
12th Aug 2002, 15:16
(I guess I'll start with me and TTL)

So Aqarius and THE True Lara walk down the middle staircase, Lara and dgx2001 take the furtherest on the right, and thanhkim and V_Croft take the one on the left.

"You didn't have to elbow me in the kidney you know!" says Aquarius

"Hey I said I was sorry!" say TTL

"You know we'll probably find hoards of Richard Simmons down here don't you?" Aquarius says.

"Shut up! That's not funny!" shouts TTL

"Okay, okay, just don't shout. We don't know what we'll find down here."

"So what do you make of that giant lettuce thing, do you think there are more of them?"

"Well obviously there must be, since there is an entire giant salad waiting in front of us......."

"Oh"

Meanwhile, the other pairs.........

And then Prelude.........

Prelude
13th Aug 2002, 01:26
Originally posted by THE True Lara
"Okay, since there's an equal number of us that's divasable by 3, I suggest we split up into pairs and each take a staircase." Begins Lara.
"What an odd thing to say..." whispers Aquarius.
"Right, Thankhim with V_Croft, Aquarius with TTL, and dgx2001 you're with me. Any complaints?!"


What happened to Beks????? and to Dagger of Xian????
Did I miss something?

BTW LOL! :D Story is getting interesting again.

Aquarius
13th Aug 2002, 03:31
Well we'll just have to reaccount for them now, won't we? :D BTW, what actually has happened to Beks? She is hardly around now....... :(

Meanwhile, in another part of this huge cavern, Beks and Dagger of Xian are wandering through the dark, when they come upon, none other than Dino, the inflatable ring toy!

"Dino!!!!" screams out Beks histarically. "I thought I'd lost you forever when you popped........wait, you did pop. So how are like this again? Oh well, not like you could tell me, but yay!!"

"Well actually I can tell you!" states Dino in a matter of factly way.

THE True Lara
13th Aug 2002, 12:46
Originally posted by Prelude


What happened to Beks????? and to Dagger of Xian????
Did I miss something?

BTW LOL! :D Story is getting interesting again.

....I did it again didn't I... :(

Doh!

dgx2001
13th Aug 2002, 20:50
We decend deeper into the seemingly endless cavern

Me:"I got a bad feeling about this, Lara" I say as i put out my cigarete.
Me:"Lara, you still here?" I say tapping her on the shoulder.
Lara:"O, yea, i got a bad feeling too"
Me:"Okay, youre still alive, hehe"
I look behind me :eek: :eek: :eek:
Lara:"I gotta tell you something.."
Me:"i gotta tell you something too... THE CAVERN IS ON FIRE!!"
Lara:"WHAT?!"
Me:".....and the stairs......."
Lara:"RUNNN!!!"
2 minutes later, we reach the bottom of the stairs, look behind us, and the flames are gone.
Me:"That tunnel is stone! How did it light on fire????!!!"
Lara:"Problably the Lion king messing with our minds."
We turn around and we see Swampy the Sea Hag!
"BLAAAAAAA!"
I take out a pistol and fire and round into its foot and it runs off whimpering(again).
All of a sudden, 50 carrot minions come out with Ak-47s
Me:"Were surrounded!"
Lara:"This is nice!"
Carrot Leader:"Come with us, humans! Or die!"
Me:"No matter how much i try, the baddies always sneak up on me.."
Lara:"Maybe if we ask nicely, they'll go away?"
Me:"Then again,"
Lara:"Maybe not!"
We reach for our weapons, but by now the carrots have pointed the guns at our heads and taken our packs.
Me:"What do we do now?"
Lara:"Easy, be taken prisoner"

THE True Lara
13th Aug 2002, 21:08
...Mean while Thanhkim and V_Croft have reached the bottom of their stairs....

V_Croft: "I'm bored, our tunnel is rubbish, I say we go back and search with the other guys!"
Thanhkim: "Yes, Lara will need my assistance!" and she truns to go when V_Croft grabs the back of her shirt hauling her back
V_Croft: "Wait! did you hear that!?"
T: "Was it Lara?!"
V_C: "no,"
T: "Was it Prelude?"
V_C: "no"
T: "Then what?!"
V_C: "I'm not sure, just listen!"
T: "Well what was it like?" :confused:
V_C: "Sort of like the sound a large group of radishes would make if they were trying to sneak up behind you....."
T: "That's a vivid description, what makes you say that"
V_Croft just points to the massing vegetable army infront of them :eek:
T: "Ah. I see."
V_C: "Told you our tunnel was rubbish, I bet this hasn't happend to the rest of the gang!" :p

dgx2001
13th Aug 2002, 21:54
We are brought to a cavern which are used to house the Lion Kings Prisoners. Were the only ones though....

Carrot solider: "Male, this is your cell." he said while shoving me into the cell and locking the cell door.
I could only speculate where Lara was.
With a solid concrete bed, and nothing else, not even a pillow, i stayed up for what seemed 3 days, but it was only 3 minutes.
Carrot guard:"The King wants to see you, human" The carrot said while opening the cell door.
Me:"Why?"
He pointed his gun at me
Carrot Guard:"You will walk or i will drag you!!!"
Me:"Well, given the option, ill walk."
He brings me into a huge circular room, with the Lion King at the center.
Lion King:"Ah, sir, dgx2001, sit down"
Me:"My friends call me D."
Lion King:"Well then ill call you d. You smoke?" Me:"Thanks."
Me:"Ok, what did you call me here for?"
Lion King:"If you havent heard, Jraiders contract with me has.... expired. I want you to take his place"
Me:"Ah, and what is my job?"
Lion King:"Simple, keep me alive, and i give you eternal life"
Me:"Very tempting offer, and what do i have to do to earn this contract?"
Lion King:"Kill your friends, including that woman who was brought in with you."
Me:"And if i refuse your genorous offer?"
Lion King:"2 possibilities, either you rot here for the rest of your life, or you die."
Me:"Well, ill have to think about this before i make a diecison"
Lion King:"Of course. Ill have someone escort you back to your cell."
Me:"Thank you"
Me and the carrot guard walk out.
Lion King:"keep a close eye on him..."
Raidish Guard:"Yes Lord."

Prelude
14th Aug 2002, 01:27
Originally posted by dgx2001

Lion King:"keep a close eye on him..."
Raidish Guard:"Yes Lord."

http://216.40.241.68/otn/realhappy/xxrotflmao.gif Man that is soooooo funny......Raidish Guard!!!!!! http://216.40.241.68/contrib/Bizkit/laugh.gif still laughing!

THE True Lara
14th Aug 2002, 08:34
.....Mean whille it appears Prelude is still in hysterics!

you could do yourself a mischeif girl!

dgx2001
14th Aug 2002, 09:16
Originally posted by Prelude


http://216.40.241.68/otn/realhappy/xxrotflmao.gif Man that is soooooo funny......Raidish Guard!!!!!! http://216.40.241.68/contrib/Bizkit/laugh.gif still laughing!

Thought you would like that one :D

dgx2001
14th Aug 2002, 20:56
*smacks into conciusness (again)*

thanhkim
14th Aug 2002, 21:37
We are also taken to the cells where the other's are. VC is put in his cell and I'm stuck in mine. I wave and say Hi Lara! You got a plan to get out of here. Lara makes a shhhh signal and points as one of the guards walk past. Lara breaks one of the cell bars and gets herself out, the she breaks me out. With are bars we take them as weapons and break the others out. As we are running we've smashing up the food guards as we go along. Once we all meet up again we make a plan to finally get rid of the Lion King for good.......

continue

dgx2001
15th Aug 2002, 02:09
I lay out a map of the caverns on the table.
VCroft:"And where did you get this?"
Me:"I drew up a vauge sketch based on what i saw while they brought me in."
Me:"Alright heres the deal we-"
Thanhkim:"Who do you think you are? Lara's the leader here!"
Lara:"Im a field op, not a strategist, Thanhkim. Go on d."
Me:"Thank you. Now, were not going to get very far with a few metal bars as weapons. Our equipment is in a small room in the northeast corner of this cavern. There are 2 guards by the entrance. Ill send a fake message to these guards saying that the King wants to see them. Youll have about 3 minutes to get there, grab our stuff, and get out. There must be no trace we were ever there."
Aquaris:"Seems simple."
TTL:"Im in."
Lara:"Lets do it!"
__________________

Cruton Guard:"The king? We..We..we didnt do anything wrong!"
Cruton Guard 2:"Well, then we have nothing to worry about."
The others sneak into the room, grab our packs, and leave without anyone noticing.
__________________

The others meet me in front of the double doors leading to the Lion King.
Me:"It went well?"
Vcroft:"Smooth as silk."
Lara tosses me my pack.
Me:"I guess it did"
I reach into my pack and pull out 2 Uzi's, and 2 daggers.
Thanhkim:"Are those really nessacery?"
Me:"Just in case it gets messy."
TTL:"I feel sorry for Beks, Prelude, and DofX, thier going to miss a very intresting fight."
Aquaris:"I have a feeling well miss them."
Lara:"Well, everyone ready?"

We load our weapons and prepare to fight.....

Im getting creative all of a sudden :D

THE True Lara
17th Aug 2002, 08:27
I'd carry on, but I'm not entirely sure what we're supposed to be doing, so unless you want one of my not-quite-making-sense-with-the-rest-of-the-other-posts,-posts I'll just wait for some other good natured Crofteer to post :D

Solaris
19th Aug 2002, 22:03
(im back!!)

A little crisis here..i have been reading the story and i want to know who am i split up with???

dgx2001
20th Aug 2002, 01:01
Nice to see ya back DofX!
You spilt up with Beks and just found Dino alive! lol

THE True Lara
20th Aug 2002, 13:59
I'm still unsure as to what we do next?! :confused:

Solaris
20th Aug 2002, 14:33
(thanks for the welcome!)
(im stuck withe Beks (great j/k))

I stare bewildered at the talking inflateble toy..Beks stares at it likes it the most normal thing in the world.

"Well the reason you have found me here is because..well i have been dragging my self up to u people and now i cant drag anymore because im caught on something." Dino says as a matter-of-factly

"So that means we are just a tunnel behind..." im cut off short by the sound of gun shots and the smell of cooked radish...

"Hey..the guys...the going after the lion king!!...no SIMBA!!!!!!" Beks yells and goes into a tantrum on the floor.

"Beks get up!! we are just gonna have to follow the noises...."

footsteps..and the sound of beer can rolling.

"Prelude??..anyone??"

Beks stops her tantrum..and peers hard into the darkness..she gets up and grabs dino..

"did u hear that?' Beks asks dino

Solaris
20th Aug 2002, 20:13
anyone out there?????

*bump...bump*

dgx2001
21st Aug 2002, 03:52
You guys alive? :p

Aquarius
21st Aug 2002, 04:06
How about instead of you trying to boss everyone around, and tell them to post or else, YOU post. It's getting tiring how you're doing that. So just drop the attitude.........

I myself would continue the story, but I've been sick since about Saturday, and still have a bit of jet lag hanging over, so I'm in no condition (or mood!) to contribute.

dgx2001
21st Aug 2002, 04:30
I respect your veiwpoint Aquaris, but im not trying to boss anyone around. Sorry if any of you took it hard.
I hope you feel better Aquaris.

Solaris
21st Aug 2002, 14:02
Can we please continue with the story..i have my plot i dont want to write another one!!!

dgx2001
21st Aug 2002, 16:06
Im leaving in about 10 mins and i wont be back for 2 weeks so,
here goes:

We all continue to fire on the dragon sized beast.

Vcroft:"Its not dying!"
Arqauris:"Really! You think?!"
Vcroft:"Yea i do!" :p
We all go to reload , all of a sudden, i hear a gunshot and feel a sharp pain in my chest.....

(sorry it wasent longer)
(Have fun while im gone guys!)

Jonnie
21st Aug 2002, 18:01
Just then Vcroft spun around, "what was that?" an anti-tank personel launched missile whistled past her left ear and hit the dragon square between the eyes all Vcroft saw was a silloweted figured running into the darkness. (could be me?)

Solaris
21st Aug 2002, 18:45
*have fun!!*

Mean while back at the tunnel, Beks once strong is now playing with Dino...she begins to take out a tea set.

Me: this is not a good time Beks to have tea...but give me some anyways.

*Beks prepares the tea..we then hear histerical laughing*

Dino: who is making such a racket???

Beks: PRELUDE!

*Prelude appears*

Prelude: Hey guys..the funniest thing happened... a gay lettuce attacked me and well..

Prelude doesnt even finish she just crashes into Beks te set and starts eating the biscuts

Mean while back at the Lion king...

Solaris
21st Aug 2002, 23:55
*bump,bump*

Is there anyone out there??

Stevo8710
22nd Aug 2002, 05:02
Everyone is gone... where are they.... back in the tunnel Prelude finishes all the biscuits and then wips out another beer... Beks confused and kinda turned on but then heres a noise..

"whats that" Beks said
" I don't know" said dino
Then from behind they here a crackle and..... AHHHHHH!!!
Prelude screams and poors beer all over her white T-shirt. It's me(stevo8710) playing jokes.

"HA HA HA" I scared you
"No you didn't" says Beks covering his crotch from the recent peeing.
"What are you doing here" says Dino
" Lara saved me. She found me in a cage and rescued me"
"why were you in a cage" says Prelude
"I can't get into that right now we have to go and.."
They here a bunch of screams in the distance.. they run that way and OMG... It's

THE True Lara
22nd Aug 2002, 09:24
The True Lara! :)

"What are you doing here?" asks Dino,
"I could ask the same..." I reply, "actually I was helping everyone else attack something or other, but though I heard a tea set being used.... so where's the tea? I could just murder a cuppa!"
"You left them for a cup of tea?" asks Dagger of Xian
"It's a British thing" ;) "It's not like I won't go back eventually..... Aquarius is the only person who I can exchange 'Princess Bride quotes with. :( So what have you got? Earl Grey? Any Crumpets?

Just as Beks is about to reply a crashing sound begins to get louder from the tunnel behind us.....



* coincidentally I'm sorry I haven't posted lately, things have been more than hectic, as my Grandad died at the weekend, the washing machine, cooker, grill, and tumble dryer have all broken, and to top it off I've got to get packed to go on holiday on Saturday! These things always happen in sets don't they?! :confused: :(
So good luck everyone, keep the adventure going. ;) *

Prelude
22nd Aug 2002, 11:33
Back stage stuff....

Welcome new comers, it is always nice to see people joining in on our lunacy. However a friendly word of advice, please read the story before posting to avoid confusion.

@ Jonnie we are not fighting a Dragon, we are fighting the Lion King and his Salad and Vegetable minions.

@ stevo8710 ‘Beks’ is a WOMAN!!!!! He he :) and how did you know I was wearing a white T-shirt you saucy little minx ;)

@ Aquarius sorry to hear you are not well, look forward to you rejoining us soon

@ Dagger of Xain good to have you back, keep on raiding girl :)

@ TTL so sorry to hear of your bad news, my thoughts are will you my dear.

@ dgx2001 BYE!!!!!! Have fun.

Now I’ve got that out of the way on with the story…..


Originally posted by dgx2001

We all go to reload , all of a sudden, i hear a gunshot and feel a sharp pain in my chest.....


dgx2001 “bbuurrrpppppp!!!!”

dgx2001 lets out a huge belch, V_croft, Aquarius, Lara, Thanhkim all turn to look at him

dgx2001 “sorry wind” looking embarrassed

They watch on as the Lion King topples and letting out a final roar he falls to the ground, within seconds his Salad minions also fall becoming nothings but lifeless fruits and veg again.

The gang look on in amazement, ‘well that was easy” says Lara
Aquarius ‘who was that with the rocket launcher?’
V_croft ‘don’t know?’

Just then Beks, Prelude, TTL, Stevo, Dagger and Dino burst into the room, “don’t panic guys” say Beks “we are here’ Prelude does a forward roll grabbing an AK47 from the clutches of a lifeless lettuce, she then opens fire sending spent cartridge and bits of salad flying. Beks does the same, Dagger and TTL pick up swords and begin hacking at radishes. Lara tries to make herself heard above the gun fire “Guys! Guys! GUYS!” she smacks Prelude upside the head with her pistol
Prelude “Oww!” They all stop.
Lara “Guys you’re a little late, its over, look see, the lion king is dead” Pointing
Suddenly Beks begins to wail “oh no you killed him….(stopping) that’s horrid!”
"sorry we were just having some tea and then we heard this clattering noise and then........"Prelude looking around and suddenly realising there is food everywhere “FOOD!!!!!” she drives head first into a pile of tomatoes. “MMMM these are good” she says munching away “anyone got any salad cream?”
The others look on in amazement “What!” says Prelude.
Beks shrugging shoulders “oh well” and drives in to join Prelude, followed by the others.
They feast merrily but then.........

(I can’t write any more at the moment , I’m at work and people are looking at me strangely)

Solaris
22nd Aug 2002, 14:54
Back Stage:
*Sorry for your loss TTL..
*What were yuo doing for people to loo at you that way prelude??

Back to the story:

But Then...

A strange, loud, roaring noise is heard..
All of a sudden the Lion King Pops up alive and Richard Simmons appears out of no where severly chopped.

RS: Thought you can blow me up eh? well now u r really gonna dpo some STRETCHES! So c'mon fat america work with me!

TTL: ITS YOU!!!!!!!!!! *runs around screaming* I KILLED YOU!!!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.....

Lk: Well im not dead you fools..im immortal. But my Vegi army seems dea..so i brought backup my FRUIT KLAN!!!

Prelude: More food! WooHOO!!

*everyone stares at Prelude*

Prelude: What you think i could fill up on this stuff?

Dgx2001: Anyways.. How did richard survive? and Fruits???

Lara: well we can beat them! we beat dinosaurs,man eating moles, little dogs...

Thanhkim: Yes we can do it Lara!

*we all get are guns ready..but then...*

Jonnie
22nd Aug 2002, 18:17
Originally posted by Jonnie
Just then Vcroft spun around, "what was that?" an anti-tank personel launched missile whistled past her left ear and hit the dragon square between the eyes all Vcroft saw was a silloweted figured running into the darkness. (could be me?)

Sorry, got confused!;)

THE True Lara
22nd Aug 2002, 20:22
* Prelude, Dagger of Xian, thanks for your sympathy, it's appriciated :) *

...rocks begin to fall down around, us, THE CELING IS COLLAPSING!!!! -the group turn to see me letting off explosives systematically around the walls...
"we'll see if you can survive this Simmons" I yell manically!

"Great plan," yells Dino, "but have you noticed we're still in here! -and I don't fair too well with sharp rocks!" :(

"We need to get out of here, and now guys!" Lara shouts, over the the din, "this way!" she rushes off...
some one grabs me by the shoulders, "that's enough explosives for today..." I hear Prelude say between mouthfulls of sandwich, as she hauls me to my feet,
"Did we actually find what we were 'raiding' for in the end?", I hear one of the gang ask in the distance.
As the cave begins to disappear underneath the falling rock the group head after Lara, presumably, we think, the way out.....

Stevo8710
23rd Aug 2002, 00:44
..Stevo8710, embarrased about thinking beks is a man, takes a beer from Preludes infinite stash in her backpack and chugs it, and then takes another, and another. As the others see the light in the distance stevo8710 ,shaky and wasted, sees a painting on the wall of the Lion King with a woman in his mouth somewhat resembling lara.
"Derr... hehe look.. lara's dead" said stevo8710
As he looks at the picture he leans against it and then the ground rumbles.

"Ugh NOW what?" says Prelude
"earthquake?" Says Dagger of Xian
"really?" says lara sarcastically

Then as Stevo8710 backs away from the wall it flips revealing a Lion king but different, larger and much more gruesome. Then the ground falls and everyone with it.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!....*gasp for breath* AHhhhhhhhhh!!!
"SPLASH" they land in a underground lake..

"Great now my sandwich is all soggy" Says Prelude but then shrugs and eats it anyway.
"whats that?" says stevo8710
They look in the shadows and see something slithering towards them....

Prelude
23rd Aug 2002, 15:11
This rocks Stevo8710, kudos to you :D

Solaris
23rd Aug 2002, 15:53
They look in the shadows and see something slithering towards them....

TTL: What is that?

Prelude: Whatever it is its not taking my cream cake or salad, or sandwhich, or...

Beks; Where did you get all that food?

Prelude stares around innocently..

Aquarius: Who cares about where prelude got the food! there is a huge thing slithering about to get us!

Lara: looks like a serpent...hmm interesting...

Just then the serpent thing picks up its head and...

Prelude
23rd Aug 2002, 17:33
……Grabs Preludes sandwich!

Prelude: NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Prelude draws back her powerful right fist and punches the serpent square on the nose. The serpent stops and looks dazed, blinking it stares down at the gang, suddenly it’s surprised expression turns to a frown and then a whimper, it pulls it’s self up and scurries off crying.

Prelude takes another bite and then offering it up says ‘anyone want a sandwich?’
The gang back away from her, V_Croft says nervously ‘Nooo iiit’s ok Prelude yoooou keep it’
Prelude finishes it ‘suit yourself’
Lara: right what do we do now?
Aquarius: Hang on a minute isn’t this the lake we started in?
Dino: Yep, I’d recognise it anywhere, this is where you left me to die
Beks: Look I said I was sorry about that….
Dagger: Do mean you to tell me we are right back were we started?
Dgx2001: Geez that sucks!
Lara: Maybe not, since we never found what we were looking for perhaps we went the wrong way, this time I think we should…..
stevo8710 swims over to Prelude: Prelude *hic* can I hav anotherrr bbeerr *hic*
‘Gasps!’ The gang await the response, horrified….
Prelude: (pause) Of course you can, hear you are. (Throws can over)
‘Phew!’
TTL: You know something just accrued to me……
All: what?
TTL: If this is the lake we started off in….
All: Yes……
TTL: Then wasn’t there a huge scary black lake octopus that stops the lake from being littered?
All: AAHHHHHH!
Lara: Lets get out of here……..

(sorry guys that the best I can do for now, I'm going away until Sunday, keep it going)

Stevo8710
23rd Aug 2002, 18:07
THANX Prelude!

As everyone wades through the murky water they notice that they are sinking.

"Oh no, we're sinking!" says prelude
"I'm shrinking haha *hic*" says stevo8710
"Ahh" screams everyone

As there heads submerge underwater they hold their breath for what it feels like forever but is really about 30 seconds and fall from a ceiling.

"what?" says The true lara
"Look the ceiling is made of water" says lara
"coooooll hehe" says stevo8710
They notice there are 2 ways to go. They find themselves in a narrow passage that looked like it stretched for eternity in both directions.
"We have to split up" says lara
"I'm *hic* goin with you" says stevo8710
"Me 2" says Prelude
"I don't care who goes with who, we need to get moving!" says lara
So they split up...

THE True Lara
23rd Aug 2002, 22:23
Just a quick goodbye, I'll 'see' you all in 10 days. Have a nice adventure, let me know how it goes.
+ Good Luck! :D

Solaris
24th Aug 2002, 17:59
we split up into 2 groups:

Group number 1 consists of:
Lara
Dgx2001
Me
Prelude
Stevo8710
Thanhkim
Group 2 conists of:
TTL
Beks
V Croft
Aquarius
Dino
JunoJIm

The actual sorting took Long..for everyone wanted to be with Lara.

Lara; Thats it no more changing...im getting pissed so stop ur whining!

*everyone looks horrified at Lara, no one dares say a word. *

Lara: good..now we'll take the left tunnel..the rest of you the right tunnel..be careful.

*we split up*

Prelude: so..what exactly are we looking for? can it be food?

Dgx2001: How can you be thinking of food now!?

Stevo8710: Look whats that?

*we look ahead..all we see is darkness..*

Me: well someone turn on a Flare...or a flash light..

*Prelude lights her barbeque lighter*

Lara: and where on earth did u get that?

Prelude has no time to answer when...

(someone in group 1 continue)
(if i excluded someone im sry..please include urself in one group)
(group 2 continue on with ur tunnel)

Stevo8710
24th Aug 2002, 23:51
Stevo8710: Look there, don't you see it?

Stevo8710 sees a pair of red eyes in the shadows, but when the others look they disappear.

Lara: Where I don't see it.

Stevo8710: the eyes, they were red.

Dagger of Xian: I think your seeing things.

Stevo8710: I know what I saw OK, and I saw eyes.

Prelude: Who cares, that's not important. My barbecue lighter is running out.

So they continue down the narrow passage.
They end up in a huge casm with a very narrow bridge. Their feet echo 100's of times.
Small rocks from the ceiling start to fall.

Lara: SHHHHHHH!! Be quiet, we must tiptoe or the roof will colapse

Dgx2001: ok lets move on, slowly...

Prelude, holding the lighter, gets hungry once again and digs into her backpack for a sandwich. She loses grip of the lighter and it drops on the floor, keeps falling off the brigde.

Prelude: oops!

then rocks start to fall, larger than before and the echoes getting worse.

Lara: RUUUUUUUUUNNNN!!!

Now they must run, in the dark, across a bridge where who KNOWS where it will take them. Hopefully everyone makes it.

Meanwhile....

Solaris
25th Aug 2002, 20:49
Mean While back outside:

Aquarius: Well lets go in the tunnel..

Beks: It looks scary in there...*hugs dino*

*Aquarius pushes Beks in..the group start going in. They then stop abrutly to see..*
(sry thats all i could do..Where is everyone?)

Back to Posse numero 1:

*The posse keep running in the darkness till we reach a huge wall*

Prelude: where are we..is this a huge chocolat bon bon??

Lara: how can u be thinking ..never mind i shouldnt even ask.

Dgx2001: Hey look at this a button!

Me: Push it..maybe it opens some door.

*Dgx pushes the button..a trap door opens beneath us we all fall into a quick sand pit*

Stevo8710: Quick sand!

Thanhkim: How are we supposed to get out of here..Larie dear do you have any ideas??

*the group sinks deeper and deeper....

Solaris
26th Aug 2002, 20:35
is anyone out there???

*nudge,nudge*

Stevo8710
27th Aug 2002, 02:24
Well I guess I'll keep it going...:)

Meanwhile.....

They stop to see... A rat.

Beks: he he..

The group travels down the long path then up a winding stair case..

Beks: does this EVER end!!
dino: don't get weak on us now
V Croft: finally.. the top

As the get to the top they see another long narrow corridor

Beks: greeeat!(sarcastically)
TTL: lets keep moving

AHHHHHHH!!!!

Dino: what's that
V Croft: it's coming from down there(points down the corridor)

They run down the corridor and see a grated floor. Below they see group one sinking in quick sand

Stevo8710: hey look beks.. HEEEELP!
V Croft: Dino get some rope outa your backpack

They throw down the rope and eveyone on team one grabs on.

Beks: HOLD ON!!

Everyone in group 2 grabs on and everyone in group 1 holds on for dear life

But then...

thanhkim
27th Aug 2002, 10:17
as group 2 is helping group one up. the whole tunnel spinnes around faster than lightening. when it stops we find ourselves outside looking at a complete replica of Lara's house which is made of chocolate. We standing outside the front gate and who should come out but a chocolate Lara. She greets the guests friendly and says I'm chocolara. Lara looks back at me and I burst out laughing saying Lara what is the deal it's you made of chocolate. The girl invites us in and says to Lara hi you look just like me. Lara says, no you look like me. I'm Lara Croft. Once in the house everyone sits down and suddently.....

continue.....

Solaris
27th Aug 2002, 16:52
And suddenly..

Prelude stands up and takes a bit out of the staircase railing...

Prelude: mmmm fhat fakes food..mph ufm mophm ufm??

All: PRELUDE!!

Prelude: ufm umph umfhm oof..

Lara: anyways..where are we and why do you look like me??

ChocoLara: Well you are in my house and You look like me!

Lara starts to grab her gun..

Aquarius: dont do it ..we dont know if she is good or evil..

Lara: fine..but the second she does something to me im gonna
*does violent motion if twisting her head*

Prelude: Then we can eat her!

TTL: i dont think this is a time...look up there..its..its..

dgx2001
31st Aug 2002, 19:06
Hey everybody, im back!!
nice work! Very funney!
anyways.....
_____________

We all look up and see a team of the Lion Kings Fruit Commandos rappel down from the roof.
We point guns at them, while they do the same to us.

Prelude:"uhmphumhuphum!!!!!!!"
Prelude goes into a violent rage and devours all of the fruit commandos in one gulp.
Prelude: *whiping face with napkin* "It could use a little salt."
Me: "Oh my god prelude you must have 5 stomachs!!!"
Prelude:"good guess."
Lara:"Well, it seems the Lion king wants to take us out bad.."
TTL:"Seems so"

continue....

Solaris
31st Aug 2002, 22:38
Originally posted by dgx2001
Hey everybody, im back!!
nice work! Very funney!
anyways.....
_____________

We all look up and see a team of the Lion Kings Fruit Commandos rappel down from the roof.
We point guns at them, while they do the same to us.

Prelude:"uhmphumhuphum!!!!!!!"
Prelude goes into a violent rage and devours all of the fruit commandos in one gulp.
Prelude: *whiping face with napkin* "It could use a little salt."
Me: "Oh my god prelude you must have 5 stomachs!!!"
Prelude:"good guess."
Lara:"Well, it seems the Lion king wants to take us out bad.."
TTL:"Seems so"

continue....

hey welcome back!
I thought this thread was dead..
-------------------------------------------------

But then..

Richard Simmons Clones come out of the sugar cane walls...
And the Choco Lara disolves to reveal the extremely battered up richard simmons.

TTL: WHAT THE HELL, YOUR SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD!!!!!!
*runs around screaming*

*Prelude groans in the backround*

Prelude: my stomach hurts...stupid fruit!

Then Richard simmons picks up a fruit stem and changes it into a twizzler. He swings the giant twizzler around like a lasso..he ties around the Tomb Raiding posse.

Lara: HEY! im gonna get you simmons..and your gonna die Lion king you hear me!!

Richard laughs and then....

(funny bout Prelude and 5 stomachs..:D )

dgx2001
1st Sep 2002, 01:53
A predator comes down through the hole in the roof and slays all the clones, locks on to the back of Simmons' head, and fires.
The predator collects all the bodies, looks at us. The others look like thier gonna pee in thier pants, but im not that worried, cause ive dealt with them before.
Predator:"Dgx2001? Its an honor to meet u sir."
Steveo points a gun at the pedator.
Me:"I wouldent do that if i were you, steveo"
He looks at the predator, and puts the gun down.
Lara:"Whats the deal, d?"
Me:"Ive capped off a few preds in my time, earned the respect of them."
Predator:"Should i kill them?"
Me:"No, no, no just amke sure richard simmons dosent come alive again, and tell the Viceroy i give my condolenses for his recent loss."
Predator:"Yes. Nice to meet u all. Farewell!"
The Predator cloaks, and disappers.
Aqauris:"You didnt kill a predator!"
Me:"i did too!"
Steveo:"How?"
Me:"If i told ya, i would have to kill ya."
Steveo:"Uh-hu"
Lara:"Everybody quiet!"
We get out of the giant twizzler
Me:"See, Predators really do exist!"
TTL:"At least Simmons is dead for good."
We walk out of the candy masion gates
All of a sudden, the Lion king appers in front of us.
Lion KIng:"You people are very skilled indeed, You have defeated both my Fruit minions, and salad minions. But see if u can survive this!"
All of a sudden, an army of Aliens of the the Alien saga apper in front of us.
The others draw thier guns, but all of the Aliens are looking to kill me.
Alien Leader:"Thank You for this oppurtunity, King.Dgx2001, I will have your head as my prize!"
Lion king:"I called a few of your old friends back, d. muhahaha!!"
The Lion King then disappers.
Lara:"what is this now, d?"
Me:"its a LONG story"
Alien leader:"Kill them all!!"
An army of predators then apper in front of us.
Leading the army is the same predator who killed Simmons.
Predator:"We'll handle these infidels, you can escape, GO!!"

continue...
(i know its a litlle corny, but i felt it would be good to fit in.)

Prelude
1st Sep 2002, 15:30
Originally posted by dgx2001

Prelude goes into a violent rage and devours all of the fruit commandos in one gulp.
Prelude: *whiping face with napkin* "It could use a little salt."
Me: "Oh my god prelude you must have 5 stomachs!!!"
Prelude:"good guess."


(Frigging hilarious, Prelude 5 stomachs, he he :D )

Continuing....

Prelude: Ok so that was weird!
Dgx2001: Oh and a house made of chocolate isn’t?!
Prelude: No!
Dagger: So what do we do now?
The gang shrug their shoulders and look at Lara
Lara: Don’t look at me, I’m out of ideas
Prelude: Gang, you know I…..don’t ..feel…too ..well
Aquarius: Well, we gotta do something, so lets just go this way and see what we find
V-Croft: I think we should go this way (pointing other direction)
TTL: You know what lets go that way (pointing in different direction)
Stevo: Oh for god sake you guys, Lara which way shall....
Prelude: Guys!…I really don’t feel well…
Beks: Here you go mate have a beer, that will help
Prelude: No thanks
*huge GASP!!!!!* The gang suddenly realise that Prelude is really not well, they turn to look at her
TTL: Geez Prelude you look kinda sick
Prelude: I feel… *thud*
Prelude suddenly falls to the floor, struggling for breath and clutching her chest. She is rolling on the floor in agony, V-Croft, TTL, Beks, Stevo, Aquarius, and Dagger all run to help her, they try and hold her down, but she starts having convolutions.
Thanhkim: Lara help her!
Lara: Oh my god, what’s wrong with her?
They all look to Prelude, who seems to be getting worse, still struggling to claim her, the gang notice her chest seems to be moving, like something is trying to break out of it. Prelude now in immense pain manages to grab Dgx2001 arm.....
Prelude: kill….me….
Dgx2001 suddenly clicks what’s happening, he stands and without hesitation pulls weapon, aiming at Prelude, he squeezes the trigger, but Lara jumps up and pushes his arm away as he fires....
Lara: No d, she’s one of us, she might live
Dgx: Are you kidding, I’ve seen this before, one of the aliens has got inside her and its about to jump out and kill us all
Just then prelude breaks free of the gang and clutches her chest in an attempted to prevent the inevitable, she then seems to pause, the gang look on in horror……….
She then lets out the biggest belch ever heard by man in all time, it echo’s round the cave and continues for about 5 minutes, the ground shakes and rubble and stones fall from the near by cliffs. The Lion King sitting in his chamber looks around nervously, the predators and aliens stop fighting and look at each other, stunned, Swampy the sea hag picks up her gold coins and swims off whimpering, the gigantic man eating mole digs a tunnel to the centre of the earth and never returns, the huge scary black lake octopus, the serpent and the dragon all cover their ears, Richard Simmons lifeless remains…..remain lifeless
finally she finishes and rubbing her stomach says...

Prelude: Oh man, that’s better, fruit always gives me gas, hey Beks I’ll have that beer now mate…….

Solaris
1st Sep 2002, 19:30
(lOLOLOLOLOLOL funny!)

*we all look at prelude, Beks hands her the beer*

Lara: OMG! thats the big "alien" geez prelude next time dont act so dramatic!
Prelude: What? i wasnt acting dramatic! it was my body going out of control.
Dgx: at least everything we met on the way has disappered. so which way are we going?
TTL: dont you guys realize! Richard Simmons is gone! WOOHOO PARTY!!!
Aquarius: not now! lets go this way (points left)
Thanhkim:Lara dear which way should we go??
Lara: dunno..
Dagger: look, up there (points up to see...)

(Prelude im still laughing..hahahaa...*tries to catch breath, faints*)

Stevo8710
1st Sep 2002, 23:49
... it's some sort of blue light? And it's coming closer

Prelude: OH NO!! IT'S K-MARTS BLUE LIGHT SPECIAL.AHHHH!!!

Stevo: Quit joking around.

Prelude: hehe!

Dgx: What is that?

As they stare in aww the light becomes very bright. They close their eyes. When the light dims they open their eyes to find themselves outside right next to the plane.

Dagger of Xian: What?

The blue light ( now a little ball of blue fire floating) Speaks to them.

Blue Fire: You will be doomed for all eternity if you ever return here! Come back... and you'll NEVER LEAVE! HAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!

Then the fire dissapears.

Stevo: Ugh! Finally over.

Aquarius: You would think we would start off with a small adventure, but Nooooo we had a 210 post adventure lol.

As the sun sets you see our heroes walking in the distance on their way home...



Thanhkim: Wait! Where's lara

Stevo: Laraaaaaa

Prelude: Lara?

AhhhhhhhhH!! They here a scream in the distance.

Dagger of Xian: Now it's our turn to save lara.

Stevo: Here we go again!

TTL: Let's go!

They all look at each other and smile.. then run back into the cave.

To Be Continued...

(I think that makes a good ending.. but also we can keep it going in a new thread if you like or this one too.)

Solaris
3rd Sep 2002, 01:29
*regains concisnuess*

We've eneded it!?

Oh okay..so who's gonna make a new story?
or should we maybe cool down on the raiding stories??

I say lets keep rading in the next new thread.
(nice ending BTW, lolz bout Kmart Blue light special!):D :( ;)

Prelude
3rd Sep 2002, 02:18
Guy 1: That's the end!!!!?????

Guy 2: What about the Lion King? He still lives, man this movie sucks, I'm going home

Guy 1: Yeah, you just know they are gonna bring out a part two when it ends like that

Guy 2: Well I hope that Beks girl is in it, she's hot!

Guy 1: Yeah and TTL

Guy 2: What about that belch then

Guy 1: oh man that was funny, that girl can sure put some food away

Guy 2: hey what about the bit at the begining with the peanuts and the dragon

Guy 1: Oh that was awesome, yeah and the giant lettuce, ha ha

Guy 2: What was that bit with the chocolate house all about?

Guy 1: I don't know, I didn't get it either

Guy 2: That guy stevo cracked me up

Guy 1: I like dgx2001, he seemed pretty cool

Guy 2: and Dagger of Xian she was funny

Guy 1: yeah and that Aquarius guy, nothing flustered him

Guy 2: hey what happened to that Jraider guy?

Guy 1: Beats me, he'll probably be in the next one

Guy 2: I can't believe they got Richards Simmons in it

Guy 1: Man I hope he's dead for real!

Guy 2: I guess it was pretty good

Guy 1: Yeah I guess

Guy 2: You wanna get a burger?

Guy 1: Naa, pizza

Guy 2: You want salad with that.......http://www.click-smilie.de/sammlung/lachen/lachen017.gif http://www.click-smilie.de/sammlung/lachen/lachen017.gif

Solaris
3rd Sep 2002, 02:20
*laughs at preludes post..faints again fr so much laughter*

THE True Lara
4th Sep 2002, 06:14
I'm back!!! :D


Oh, it's all over....... :confused: :(

JunoJIm
6th Sep 2002, 05:31
I'll comemorate the end of this saga, with the world's shortest poem:

FLEAS

Adam hadem

THE True Lara
6th Sep 2002, 09:04
beautiful and poigient as always........

V_Croft
6th Sep 2002, 11:26
Oh that story's awesome!
*rushing to part II*
:D